Thread by @erisabesu3

#kurodai, past ushi/dai

after 2 excruciating hours at the dmv to renew his license, kuroo can't get out of there fast enough. he zips through the parking lot to the exit lane and sees the HOTTEST cop in the world come out the front doors--uniform nice and snug, muscles galore,

competent walk, thick brown hair, a kind gaze that kuroo imagines can turn sharp as a katana when the need arises, the most kissable mouth--

💥boom-crash-crunch💥

"fuck!" kuroo shouts, slamming the brakes and lurching forward and back from the crash. he looks around wildly,

but it seems pretty clear /he/ was the one who caused the fender bender with the truck in front of him.

"fuck!" kuroo repeats through his teeth as the driver /and/ the cop start approaching his vehicle. he fumbles for the door latch and gets out, holding his hands up.

"hi, hello there," he oozes all the charm he possesses, especially after taking in the size and rather stern expression of the other driver coming closer. kuroo peeks quickly at the spot where he dinged the man's pickup, and then at the flattened accordion front of his versa.

"oof, yeah, what a blunder eh?" kuroo laughs so he doesn't start crying about the repair bill--or /bills/ more like, with the way the truck guy's brow has darkened.

"are you alright?" he asks.

"i was going to ask the same thing," says the cop.

"who me? fine! perfectly fine, really," kuroo waves them off. "i don't know what happened, i--"

"--seems clear you weren't watching where you were driving. may i see your license and registration please?" the cop asks.

kuroo's brows shoot up in alarm. "wait really? i mean--"

he turns to the truck owner. "i'm so sorry about the ding, i can pay for the repairs if we can just sort this out between us?"

the man nods. "that will be fine. here's my card." he hands kuroo a business card, which kuroo exchanges with his own.

"great, i'll be in touch." he turns to the cop. "so you see officer, we've worked it out and i'll just be on my way-"

"not so fast," the cop interrupts, pointing a thumb over his shoulder to the buildings behind him.

"we're right in front of the department of motor vehicles which is connected to police headquarters, you weren't being attentive to your surroundings and you've endangered citizens with poor driving resulting in a car crash. i can't in good conscience ignore this."

kuroo huffs, affronted. "well of course it sounds bad when you say it like that! but it's just a little fender bender, can't we overlook it this once?"

"i'm going to need that license and registration, now please." the cop gets out his ticketing book and flips to a new page.

"if i may, daichi-san," the other driver interjects. "this gentleman's car will need some serious repairs, unlike mine." he turns to kuroo. "sorry, my truck's too strong."

kuroo waves this off with a crooked smile. "nah, it's my fault to begin with."

the other man nods. "i believe he has learned his lesson. no one was hurt. issuing a ticket on top of that--"

"--is just cruel!" kuroo interupts, flinging hands. "can't you cut me a break? please officer?"

"daichi-san?" the other man folds arms across his big chest.

daichi points at the other driver. "you stay out of this, wakatoshi."

wakatoshi holds his hands up, and kuroo looks between them, curiously. "wait, you two know each other?"

"that's none of your concern," daichi says, at the same time wakatoshi says, "yes. we used to date."

kuroo's brows shoot up to his hairline. "oh. wait--used to?"

daichi sighs, hand covering his face. wakatoshi nods. "it was in the past. we parted ways amicably. we are good friends now."

"oh man," kuroo shakes his head. "that's... unusual. but good for you."

wakatoshi nods. "yes. daichi-san is a beautiful soul."

kuroo snaps his fingers. "i knew it!"

"you also think daichi-san has a beautiful soul?" wakatoshi asks.

"i think he has a beautiful everything!" kuroo blurts, grinning. wakatoshi's gaze turns piercing. he zeroes in.

kuroo swallows. "oh, uhhh, i just mean..."

"it is the truth," wakatoshi nods.

daichi makes a strangled noise, cheeks flushed. "would you two please change the subject? we are in public. license and registration, /now/ please."

kuroo pouts at the cop. "well it /is/ the truth!"

daichi turns stern. "license and--"

"--and this whole thing is kinda your fault anyways!" kuroo gesticulates.

daichi's gaze narrows. "how is this my fault? you were not paying the proper attention. that's on you."

"well if you weren't so--" kuroo gestures at daichi from head to toe and back, tsking, "--so goddamn /gorgeous/ with all that sex appeal, /maybe/ i would have been able to pay the proper attention!"

daichi's mouth drops open. wakatoshi "hmmms" beside him. kuroo presses his lips

together and prays he hasn't said too much while his driving record is on the line, but he couldn't help himself--officer daichi is sex on legs and probably causes countless accidents all over town just breathing in his uniform. god!

wakatoshi looks down at kuroo's card in his hand. "kuroo-san, my apologies. i believe i have to renegotiate our deal."

"what?" kuroo whips around to face him. "what's wrong with our deal? is this because i said your ex was sexy? because, i mean, that's just a general opinion!"

wakatoshi shakes his head. "my truck is not badly damaged. instead of paying for the repairs, i would prefer you to take daichi-san out to dinner." he hands kuroo's card to officer daichi, while kuroo's mouth falls open.

daichi takes the card, glancing at kuroo and addressing wakatoshi. "that's not how this works."

kuroo's brain kicks back into gear. "why not?" he blurts. "i know some great places to eat, it could be fun!"

daichi gives him a deadpan look. "how do i know you're not a creep?"

kuroo snorts. "me, a creep? no way, i'm a gentleman!"

"if he is a creep, then you will arrest him," wakatoshi comments.

"hey!" kuroo protests.

wakatoshi shrugs. "it is the truth. daichi-san is very strict."

"which is why i'm not getting sucked into this," daichi says.

he tries to pass the card back to kuroo, but wakatoshi steps in. "were you not just telling me that it has been difficult for you to meet new people?"

"this is not what i meant!" daichi protests. "he crashed into your truck, and you want me to go to dinner with him?"

"he crashed into my truck because he was looking at /you/," wakatoshi corrects.

"he's right," kuroo chimes in, grinning. "it might be destiny! whaddya say--let me buy you dinner?"

daichi sighs, shaking his head and putting the ticketing book away. "fine. but /i'm/ driving."

💞

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