Thread by @cindygallop

Starting my annual live-tweeting of my reading of @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue. Predictions: even MORE #CarefullyCalibratedDiversity; ageist fetishization of youth; huge amount of adspend wasted looking like everyone else; nothing's changing in fashion's old world

We LOVE @serenawilliams on the cover of @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue with @OlympiaOhanian. We don't love that the photographer wasn't a Black woman. Anna Wintour is the queen-maker - uplift a Black female photographer to be the next @annieleibovitz & pay her the $$$

.@LancomeUSA forked out the $$$ to be the @condenast @voguemagazine inside cover foldout, running the same old Julia Roberts La Vie Est Belle ad they've run for years. What a waste of a huge-impact triple-spread that @LancomeFR could've done something really creative with

Theoretically, a good effort from @LancomeUSA to be sustainable. In practice - woah, @LancomeFR, you need to budget for copywriters versus translating from the French with no copy oversight. Calling @VikkiRossWrites #CopywritersUnite @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Call me old-fashioned, @Prada, but I want to see fashion on models - preferably on real world people, especially OLDER real world people - who look like they're enjoying themselves @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue #LiveOlder

More from the school of 'Have a really grim time in our clothes', from @Dior @CondeNast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

Not only will you have a really grim time while lost in the woods in @LouisVuitton, you'll also look the opposite of stylish @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Ah, the 'contort yourself into poses nobody replicates in real life while swinging dolefully by the mausoleum' approach from @Chanel @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

I love a good New York backdrop - but why not tell a great New York story with it, @Gucci? 'Brand storytelling' is a huge missed opportunity for fashion. Why one of my favorite campaigns was @PacoRabanne 'What is remembered is up to you' @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #Septemberissue

We LOVE @TheAmandaGorman as the face of @EsteeLauder. But we would love older Black women joining her to have their beauty celebrated, even more. THAT's the change you inspire, Estee Lauder @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue #LiveOlder #SayYourAge

#CarefullyCalibratedDiversity from @EsteeLauder. Too many fashion and beauty companies believe Black models in their advertising is diversity sorted. 'The statement you make' is Black women on your leadership team and board: elcompanies.com/en/who-we-are/… @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Like I just said, @Fendi, it's not putting Black models in your ads that makes you 'diverse and inclusive', it's Black women on your leadership team and board: cbinsights.com/company/fendi/…
#CarefullyCalibratedDiversity @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

'The @tiffanyandco executive team is 39% female and 58% male. 59% of the management team is White. 12% of Tiffany & Co. management is Hispanic or Latino. 9% of the management team is Black or African American.' zippia.com/tiffany-co-car… @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

'Beyond longwear, we stand for care'?! Oh, @LancomeUSA @LancomeFr, you really do need to get your copywriting sorted out. @VikkiRossWrites #CopywritersUnite @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

There's a lot more you could be doing through your marketing to address the racism in your past, @dolcegabbana, but you're clearly not interested in that @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

I love Pierpaolo Piccioli's 'pink-out' for @MaisonValentino, but to the art directors: an all-pink background, while standout in @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue, doesn't make the clothes as impactful as they would be against a non-pink or deliberately dull background

Another brand storytelling opportunity wasted by @Bulgariofficial. If you're going to pay $$$ for Anne Hathaway, why not have @PaoloSorren and your ads do something fun in the spirit of her role in @oceans8movie versus this: @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

'Young and disaffected' by @MIUMIUofficial. How about 'older and highly appreciative', Miu Miu? @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue #LiveOlder

Want to sell a shit-ton more product for a shit-ton more money, @Ferragamo? Sell to OLDER WOMEN - by celebrating OLDER WOMEN in your ads, as fully-rounded people versus static props for your product - and see your revenues rocket @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

I love Bottega Veneta's innovative, creative (and completely unaffordable) designs. They deserve to be showcased as innovatively and creatively, not advertised the same way everybody else does in @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

The fabulous @TessaThompson_x in your ads is good, @armani. Black women on your leadership team and on your board would be even better #CarefullyCalibratedDiversity @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@marcjacobs is an incredibly creative designer. Great to see Winona Ryder back in his ads, but would have loved to see him do more with her than just have her pose the usual way @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

LOVE @McQueen's clothes - they especially offer an opportunity to tell a story in their advertising. I so wish they would. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@omegawatches, you've been doing the same thing in the same format with celebrities in your ads for years. If you're going to fork over those $$$, why not do something much more creative and interesting with them? @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Your 'Open Spaces' film was so wonderful, @Burberry. Why not do something equally innovative in print? It is possible, you know @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

An entrant in the 'this is why you hire a (great) advertising agency' category. Every year, a huge number of brands fork out for a very expensive page in @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue and then completely waste their money with non-impactful creative @maisonFK

Finally - a glimpse of editorial in the @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue advertising wild! (Et tu, @condenast + Vogue - don't show me Black models in your magazine, show me Black women on your leadership/editorial/decision-making team and board)

As I say every year about @RalphLauren, if you like this kind of thing, then this is the kind of thing you like
@CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Right now, every fashion/luxury brand in the world is hurting because of the economic downturn. Yet the concept of 'why don't we try something different and innovative to make more money' is alien to the pages of @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue @maxmara

.@Nordstrom usually books a whole series of double page spreads in @CondeNast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue. They must be belt-tightening, but for four pages, I wish they'd focused in on the laudable diversity they've shown in the past (re body diversity, disabilities etc)

.@EtroOfficial is a fashion brand with a genuinely distinctive design philosophy, but you'd never know it from this ad in @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue (My brand consultancy services are available, Etro, to make your marketing as distinctive as your outfits)

In a @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue filled with jewellery ads, it's not enough to just display your product on a model, @swarovski. As a brand with a distinctive product and approach, you could do so much more to sell. Again, my consultancy services are available 🙂

A 'fragrance of freedom' called Libre is interesting @YSL - but you know what would really sell it? 'May the bridges we burn light the way' - an older woman, flaunting her real world body, burning down the patriarchy. We'd ALL buy that @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Another in the school of 'you paid her all that $$$, why not do something innovative with her vs just asking her to pose' waste of the cost of a @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue DPS. Such a wasted opportunity to do something fab with the fab @ChloeBailey, @saks

.@johnhardy is a jeweller with a distinctive approach and product, and these portraits do give a sense of that - but miss the opportunity to leverage the Balinese provenance, a competitive marketplace advantage @condenast @voguemagazine #Septemberissue

My most hated ad genre: the male lens is so ubiquitous in fashion, WE are sold to as women through seduction techniques meant for men, here coupled with objectified disembodied body parts that mean I will never buy @sergiorossi American Psycho shoes @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

These @Caradelevingne Loves @KarlLagerfeld ads @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue made me look, and actually do the hated QR code thing - only to find it sent me to the main site, where I couldn't then find the Cara ❤️Karl collection anywhere (I searched) Big mistake. HUGE

If you can afford Loro Piana, you know what you're getting. This ad confirms it. That's all. @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue #LoroPiana

The 80s called, @versace. They want their fashion back. Beyond that, this communicates so clearly, "We only make clothes for skinny people", if you don't design for wide girth, I give you a wide berth 🙂 @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue #LiveOlder

And at last, 108 pages of advertising into @CondeNast @VogueMagazine, Anna Speaks! Beginning with the admittedly impressive scoop of @serenawilliams' retirement announcement. But, because this is the #SeptemberIssue, we then have another 14 pages of ads before we read the rest...

.@Hermes_Paris breaking away from their previous advertising format to bring in a bit more visual and contextual interest... I said just a bit @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@LoeweOfficial does hit you in the eye, although this approach jars versus the brand image built up over the years. Nevertheless, I really want that mouth-topped red dress @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

"Capitalism is alive and well and ensuring that even if you dress like this you'll never make it to the top of Wall Street - ESPECIALLY not if you dress like this". Because who are we kidding, @MichaelKors? @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Nice color combo, @TOMFORD. But I still yearn for you to revert to the kind of amazing sexy brand storytelling you did at @Gucci back in the day @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

Oh, @Chantecaille. We have this conversation every year (well, I do, but you never respond). You could do so much more with your support of @amazonheadwater. Why you need to hire an ad agency - or me 🙂 @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Anna: 'Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson photographed by @annieleibovitz.' Why is it ALWAYS ANNIE? Why not commission BLACK WOMEN PHOTOGS TO PHOTOGRAPH BLACK WOMEN & make them the next Annie Leibovitz vs Annie getting all the money + all the fame all the time? @condenast @VogueMagazine

Kudos, @Moncler. You splurged on 15 PAGES of the @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue, and then you ran creative detailing your historical journey that stands out and makes me want to investigate Moncler further. 'Extraordinary Forever' indeed 👏

J'adore @CharlizeAfrica - but I don't adore the fact, @dior, that you could do SO MUCH MORE with the incredible star of @atomic_blonde and @MadMaxMovie #ThunderRoad @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

If you are 'Fashion's best curation', @modaoperandi, you need to run fashion's best ads in the @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue. These aren't them. My consultancy services are available - [e-mail]

As we get into editorial, delighted to see the amazing @mariaressa covered by @taylorantrim in the @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue 🙌❤️

The @animalsanctuary needs an ad agency. @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

When you have built your brand painstakingly over many years to be, and stand for, the best, you can be this simple, confident and assumptive. It doesn't work for the rest of you who haven't. @ManoloBlahnik @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@intimissimi needs an ad agency. @condenast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Here's a suggestion, @Clinique. Rewrite that ad to say, 'Celebrate wrinkles with full strength. Strengthen your dermal structure for fabulous older skin.' Then I'll buy it. #LiveOlder @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@MCMTweets needs an ad agency. @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

That looks like an interesting story's about to start, @BananaRepublic. Why not tell it? @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

Note to self every time I see a @BALENCIAGA ad: must wear less black. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

The @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue editorial content purports to celebrate body diversity and inclusivity. The ads and the fashion spreads do not. #EsterManas @steffyotka

I look at these and want to say, "Oh, @vancleefarpels, just go have some FUN with it!" @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

Brunello Cucinelli is the master of the weird quote juxtaposed with an odd image. This at least makes a bit more sense than last year's ad @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

#Amaffi needs an ad agency. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

I'm going to need more than that to go on, Noble Panacea @CondeNast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

Yes, that's obviously @serenawilliams, but what do you think this is advertising? I'll wait. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@CNtraveler needs an ad agency. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

I'd rather you tell me, @rothys, in a way that makes me want to buy your shoes immediately so they can do it for me. That'll be more like it. @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

I want to celebrate my fine lines and wrinkles, @Neutrogena, not smooth and reduce them. #LiveOlder @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

I did not realize that this thread would also be a catalogue of #QRCodeFails. I thought, that's a creative way to present a QR code, @GenesisUSA, but - IT DOES NOT WORK. You didn't #MakeYourMark. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

That @MagnumIceCream @MagnumGlobal is one DELICIOUS product. When you have a truly great product, sometimes just showing it is enough. I was sufficiently motivated to check out the QR code, and... #QRCodeFails @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue

If you do have an ad agency, @SecretDeodorant, they should be ashamed of themselves. @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

Back in my day booking space in @condenast @voguemagazine was a big deal, and you created ads specially to run in Vogue taking the aesthetic context into account. @myinnovo is just one example of many advertisers in the #SeptemberIssue who haven't done that - they should, to sell

Yet more selling to women through the male lens by objectifying and presenting what men find seductive. Want to sell to me using naked women? Give me ones who look like me, are big and loud and proud of their real world naked bodies @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

You get marks @keen because your QR code actually worked - although I do recommend doing something more creative with it than just sending readers to your site, when you advertise in the @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue #QRCodeFails

Same old same old, @Balmain @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

.@moschino has such a colorful surreal heritage, being continued by @ITSJEREMYSCOTT, I would have liked to see something less decorous @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

This is a still from a compelling @petracollins film for @Blumarine_____ - I would have loved to see the print ad be more than 'matching luggage' @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

OK, @DIESEL, that certainly got my attention, but I'd like to know more about why this is relevant for selling bags? @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

Obviously, we love this interview with @serenawilliams - we just wish @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue had commissioned a Black woman to photograph a Black woman, lifting up the next Black @annieleibovitz and giving her the fame and the money

'Fashion's New World' canvasses a spectrum of industry designers and professionals - would've liked to see more upcoming vs established, but thrilled @Ferragamo hired Maximilian Davies as creative director, and to see the spread of @CFDA/@voguemagazine finalists #SeptemberIssue

Straight out of 'Fashion's New World' and into fashion's old one - @GiGiHadid? AGAIN? I'm sure she's a lovely person and obviously a seasoned professional, but for the 'New World' @CondeNast @VogueMagazine #SeptemberIssue, why not uplift new talent to model (and get the $$$)?

Obviously, we love - but we wish she'd been photographed, not by @annieleibovitz but by a Black woman photographer given the chance to become the next Annie Leibovitz, and the big bucks @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue

More of this, fashion editors AND advertisers @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue #BodyDiversity

The final advertiser in @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue - @ProcterGamble @OlaySkin #FacesOfSTEM. I'd love to see P&G take this campaign into the tech world to tackle the rampant sexism and racism there IRL. A girl can dream

OK folks - that's a wrap! If you've enjoyed this thread, please watch my @BoF interview with @imranamed to hear about the opportunities to make so much more money the fashion industry is failing to leverage: @condenast @voguemagazine #SeptemberIssue