Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #GloomyDave

Most recents (9)

Today's #GloomyDave forecast: Hawkeyes' bold gold alt uniforms provoke the wrath of a vengeful cosmos

Iowa 0
Penn State ♾
It's a shame, because the Hawkeyes were on a two game alt-uniform fashion win streak
I'm not generally against alt uniforms, except when a team pretends that black is part of their color scheme when everybody knows it isn't
Read 5 tweets
Today's #GloomyDave forecast: The 1869 National Champions are back, as undefeated Rutgers flummoxes Iowa with confusing trick offense based on the New Jersey highway system

Hawkeyes 3
Scarlet Sopranos 49
Odd factlet: Iowa and Rutgers played a football game for the first time in 2016. Iowa played at least 1 game against every team in the Pac 12 before they played against every team in the Big 10.
yeah, just try to X & O your way out of this, Ferentz
Read 3 tweets
It's Herky days until Hawkeye FB
First #GloomyDave prediction of the season: Red Hawks catch Hawkeyes looking ahead to big Rutgers game

Iowa 4
Palm Beach of Wisconsin 38
Listen guys, you're not fooling anyone
Read 13 tweets
Today's #GloomyDave forecast: Doctor Frostenstein reanimates the long dead corpse of the Big Red Machine, wreaks vengeance on hapless Hawkeyes by evening the score for the last 3 years

Iowa 44
Nebraska 124
The only scoreboard that counts: 186-179, bitches
And that's without ghey performance-enhancing center pivot irrigation
Read 12 tweets
Today's #GloomyDave forecast: tailspin Hawkeyes get taken to the slide rule shed by filthy Purple Poindexters

Northwestern 38
Iowa 3.14159
I would like to take this opportunity to remind their alumni and fans that Northwestern is the second most prestigious college in Chicago
Yes I'm aware they're a mile north of the borderline cemetery in Evanston, home of the Women's Christian Temperance Union. I'm just going off their billboard claims
Read 6 tweets
Today's #GloomyDave forecast: Bandwagon wheels fall off as hapless Hawkeyes devastated by unstoppable McSorley-Franklin double douchebag attack

Pennsylvania State University 69
Iowa -4
Iowa's only hope: Jedi mind tricks
Time to revisit the greatest football game in the history of mankind: Iowa 6, Penn State 4, October 23, 2004
Read 4 tweets
Today's #GloomyDave forecast: Hawkeye Homecoming Deathmobile gets turtle-waxed

Maryland 31
Iowa 4
I am legit gloomy about this one. As soon as Iowa figures out the forward pass, they have to face 40 mph winds. Trap game with Penn St next week. Maryland has been schizophrenic, but they beat Texas and average like 250 yds on the ground.
In case you were wondering, here are the #MarbleGame standings going into today's games. Iowa has 293 marbles, Maryland 207. If IA wins, new marble count will be IA 334, MD 166; if MD wins it will be IA 220, MD 280.…
Read 5 tweets
Today's #GloomyDave forecast:

Musicians 38
Poets 21
Indiana U has a proud history of having one of the top music programs in the country. (Humblebrag: Hawkspawn was accepted to IU School of Music but chose DePaul instead)
Best thing about this game is it provides a plausible excuse for @blueberry_town and me to pound bourbons before noon
Read 13 tweets
Bring home the bacon. boys #FightForIowa #DefendFloyd
The surprising history of Floyd of Rosedale, college football's best traveling trophy. Created to diffuse tensions over Minnesota's targeting of black Hawkeye halfback Ozzie Simmons in the 1934 game…
Even more backstory: Iowans' anger over the 1934 treatment of Simmons was amplified because of Jack Trice, a black Iowa State player who died after being stomped in the 1923 ISU-Minnesota game. ISU's stadium is named for him.…
Read 10 tweets

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