Thread by @jenmariewilde

I’m nervous to talk about this because of what people will think or who might come for me, but it’s important.

So about ten years ago, during a really tough time, I got sucked into the new age community that Williamson is part of.

https://twitter.com/Celeste_pewter/status/1144519938188533760

The kinds of things she said last night? It wasn’t new to me. I’ve heard all that before from people like her.

When you’re going through a hard time, they promise love is the answer & that you can find inner peace. I ate that shit up - even though my anxiety just got worse.

There’s so much pressure in that world to be Perfect, do all the juicing and cleansing and saging and healing and positive thinking. To buy all the books and the courses and the crystals and the meditation tracks.

And if it doesn’t work for you? If you try it all but you’re still struggling? It’s on you. You didn’t open your heart enough or raise your vibration enough or feel your pain enough.

I was young, struggling and then blaming myself for not working hard enough to ‘heal’.

Williamson is a leader in that world. She has millions of loyal followers who read her books, do her courses, listen to EVERYTHING she says.

Sometimes her words sound nice, they sound promising, but there’s no basis or fact or science behind it. There’s no plans besides LOVE.

They completely ignore reality in favor of ‘choosing love’. The answer to everything isn’t ‘choose a more positive mindset’ or ‘trust the universe.’ The answer is to dismantle the white supremacist patriarchy & change the capitalist systems that oppress & marginalize people.

Basically, in my experience, it’s a bunch of white women profiting off of cultural appropriation, refusing to acknowledge their own privilege and gaslighting people into buying their bull and their books. ALL IN THE NAME OF LOVE.

Depressed? Don’t take meds! Meditate on your pain instead! In a toxic environment? Change your vibrations! You attract what you are! Terminally ill? Ignore the doctors! Eat raw veggies and visualize healing! NO NEGATIVITY ALLOWED OR ELSE.

And in most cases, anything that challenges their unrealistic world view or asks them to see things from a different perspective counts as NEGATIVITY.

Look, I’m not saying all self-help is woo-woo and bad. Some of it is amazing! But when it ignores science, when it is sold as a magical cure-all, when it rolls its eyes at facts and socioeconomic inequalities and PLANS, it’s just dangerous.

I’m embarrassed now that I got sucked into that world. It wasn’t all bad, but it wasn’t healthy. I was so young and so lost and so in need of community, but I hate that I played a role in it.

It scared me to see Williamson on that stage.

But also? I’m mad. I’m mad because I spent most of my twenties listening to people like Williamson. They made me think going on medication = failure. But my life began when I started medication for my anxiety. It’s the best thing I ever did for myself.

See? This isn’t an exaggeration. This the kind of shit these people believe, and push onto others who are vulnerable and seeking answers.

https://twitter.com/marwilliamson/status/1662705755?s=21

Very often, I think of the girl in the community who was diagnosed with cancer and instead of chemotherapy, chose to follow this thinking and heal herself with raw food, juicing and positive thinking.

She died.

And there are so many others following this stuff like it’s fact, because they’re so desperate for answers or to feel in control of their destiny or to just FEEL anything but fear.

Holy crap I did not expect this thread to blow up. I’m surprised how many people don’t know much about this new age world?? I guess it’s still so normalized for me, I forget others haven’t been exposed to it.

I’m having trouble keeping up with my mentions but I’m so sorry to everyone who has lost loved ones who were told to ‘heal themselves’ instead of seek medical treatment. That’s heartbreaking.

Some people have asked how I got out of that world. It happened slowly. The further into it I got, the more I saw the cliques & exclusion that happened to anyone who wasn’t living up to the unrealistic expectations. It was like Mean Girls on speed.

When the anti-vaxx propaganda started floating around, it raised alarms. I’m autistic, and I found all of that crap to be incredibly dangerous and downright ableist.

It hurt to see women in my ‘community’ talking about autism like it was a fate worse than death.

I’d also started paying attention to social justice activism outside the community. Watching Franchesca Ramsay’s videos on YouTube taught me so much and I started to learn about privilege and cultural appropriation, and saw how rampant it was in the new age world.

Also? I started reconnecting with my love of fandoms & tv geekiness. I pushed that side of myself away to better fit into the world of tie-dye and mala beads and crystals. But that wasn’t me.

It might sound silly, but getting back into the Supernatural fandom saved me.

But in all honesty, I’m not completely ‘out’. The phrase that I still catch myself internalizing is this: you attract what you are.

Do you know how fucked up it is to think that everything bad that’s ever happened to you, you somehow brought on yourself?

You’re taught that you bring things into your life with your vibrations and your thoughts.

So if something awful happened, I thought I’d somehow caused it on a molecular level.

Even now, if something bad happens in my life, I search for the ways that I ‘invited’ it into my life.

Logically, I know that it’s out of my control, but jeez it’s still so hard to shake the feeling that it’s somehow my fault.

Someone mentioned The Secret in my replies and I’m really embarrassed to admit this, but that was the gateway for me entering the new age world.

I was obsessed with The Secret. I took it as doctrine. That’s where it all started for me.

Someone asked about why Oprah supports people like Williamson.

It’s different for Oprah. She’s not coming into this world from a place of desperation and vulnerability. And in her relationships with self-proclaimed ‘gurus’, she’s the one with the most power.

Also? Oprah isn’t in all the Facebook groups or private online communities, which is where a lot of the most toxic stuff goes down.

Now that I’ve put my most embarrassing secrets out in the world, someone pay me to turn it into a book or a tv show!

I’m a writer and I have so much material for a semi-fucked-up dark comedy about this world!

Please don’t tell me to give her a chance or ‘do my homework’ on her campaign. I lived this shit. Yes, maybe she has some okay policies (MAYBE), but it’s impossible for me not to associate her with the new age community and nothing is going to change that.

Besides, even if I’d never heard of her before the debates, based on what she said on that stage I wouldn’t support her.

I mean, come on, “You’re so on, girlfriend!” Really? It’s a no from me.

Adding to this again to say that so many people have reached out to share similar stories about their experiences in the new age world - and other cultish worlds.

I never considered calling it a cult, but after hearing your stories, I don’t see how it could be anything else.

I’m still not sure what to do with that realization. I’m embarrassed about it. But it’s so comforting to know it’s not just me who saw the toxicity of that world and decided to break away.

I want to do something about this. But right now I don’t know what that would be.