A second day visiting @Square for their #Neurodiversity Spotlight month. Today, it was as a guest of my friend @YourKinfolkz. She spoke about her work on creating space for marginalized LGBT+ people of color, her childhood, her life as a queer woman & an #ActuallyAutistic parent.
Actually, that was just a 10th of what she shared about her work & life experience. It’s hard to encapsulate it all in a tweet. My favorite part is when she welcomed her daughter Imani up front to talk about life as a #neurotypical child of an autistic parent.
“It was that type of energy provided my mother which allowed me to see myself as necessary,” - @YourKinfolkz speaking on how her mother grounded herself in confidence and self-worth, dubbing herself “Queen Bee” over two decades ago.
“When I finally did speak, they couldn’t shut me up,” - @YourKinfolkz discussing how she memorized books and records of phonics and reading lessons while still non-verbal. And speak up she did...
.@YourKinfolkz discussed how she came into the name ‘Kin Folkz’ in school when she called out a teacher for a homophobic remark. “We’re all kin,” she said. The teacher responded “You talk too much,” and sent her to the principal. While there, she heard noises in the hall...
The hall was filled with students who had followed her. When staff asked them to give their names, they responded with “We’re kinfolks.”
Threaded throughout her talk (and work) is this beautiful mosaic of intersectional justice. Her events for queer people utilize communications badges in ways many autistic events do. Her learning of black empowerment informs her empowerment as a disabled person.
Over the past year, I’ve come to know and love @YourKinfolkz as a friend. The world should know her as well. Her work creating and holding space for marginalized groups serves as a template for autistic queer community.
Video Description: A video of Kinfolkz and Imani talking about Imani being the child of an autistic parent.
I’ve rewatched this five times ready.
Video Description: A video of Imani, a young woman, asking her mother Kinfolkz about her experience as an autistic parent.
It’s hard for me to put words to this feeling, but as an autistic person it feels urgent to provide space (and step back) for other autistic voices, particularly black autistic voices. The work of @YourKinfolkz shows that. It’s not just ethical. It’s crucial to our movement.
The work I see Kinfolkz do with #SpectrumQueerMedia provides such a template of building autistic space. It also makes me proud that it is an autistic woman creating this space for marginalized groups, knitting together community, and running an organization empowering others.
Someone wrote that Judge Amy Coney Barrett would bring “heart” to ‘special needs’ if confirmed to the #SupremeCourt. After showing my respect for the person who wrote that, and understanding of where they were coming from, this was my response:
“Disabled people don’t need lawmakers or jurors to bring “heart” to ‘special needs’. That’s what has led to patronizing policy which has f%¥ked over the exercise of our equality and marginalized our full participation in society over-and-over-and-over again...
It’s one of the greatest things we organize and fight against and we will continue to fight against it until the law and policy makers recognize that we are just like everyone else...
The whole #BobWoodward thing reminds me that our better politicians understand the press will try to ‘get’ them, and that’s a good, healthy thing for our democracy. They respect and welcome that.
—> It’s a BS check.
Bad politicians think the press is there to serve them.
*I should say it’s not as much that the press tries to “get” politicians, but that they don’t regard a politician’s messaging priorities when they are reporting stories. That’s an amazing thing, and when I was a press officer it drove me up the wall.
I hated it, but I loved it.
And the #BobWoodward tapes remind me of #LouChibarro of the @WashBlade. When I was a press officer, he was so masterful in asking a question, letting you answer, then NOT SAYING ANYTHING.
The subject felt compelled to fill the silence with more information.
👨🍳💋
So, while I very much *feel* #SpoonTheory in my being, it all falls apart when trying to use it as a metaphor with others (or as an accommodation strategy for myself). I constantly miscount and lose them.
When speaking, or in meetings, I’m often asked by folks to explain spoon theory. I usually just turn to someone I trust and ask “Could you explain it?”
For myself, I’ve learned to just make myself stop, slow down, or turn down requests when needed — and to be ok with that.
I mean, I’m a huge supporter of spoon theory as a metaphor to explain things to others and as an accomodation peoole can use themselves. It just all gets tangled and anxiety-inducing for me.
I love to laugh at that, though. You kind of gotta.
I often think on how research, medicine, and psychiatry approach and ‘treat’ autistic people today in the exact same manner they approached and ‘treated’ homosexuality until 1972.
Then, thanks to #LGBTQ advocates, homosexuality was suddenly ‘cured’ by @APAPsychiatric overnight.
Where are the endless research papers about the genetics and epigenetics of gay people?
Where are the warnings of “risk factors” for lesbians?
Where’s the pleading for “early intervention” for bisexuals?
What about environmental factors?!?!
We probably know less about gay people now than autistic people. But, we know enough not to funnel everything about LGBTQ people through a pathological frame.
All the questions we ask about autism are still there (and largely unanswered) for LGBTQ people.