The aggression playing out in social media is rooted in our culture of hierarchical, dominance-based masculinity, playing out minus the countervailing moderation found in personal interactions (we know you, we will see you again). In this way, social media is a Rorschach test. /1
Social media's lack of accountability, (very few face consequences) means that men and women, bullied and socialized into aligning with dominance culture use highly abusive language, mirroring their own abuse. In this way, social media reveals a persons level of early trauma. /2
This dangerous space allows people to calcify and express abusive racist and sexist frames in relative anonymity. Any remaining social restrictions dissipate. They are drawn to communities that mirror that language. It feels like belonging. /3
THEN something far worse happens. Organizations with authoritarian agendas backed by vast amounts of dark money from domestic and foreign players fuel online recruitment. The freedom to express hate is weaponized into real world movements that show up on our streets. /4
What begins as the narcotic thrill of speaking anonymously online in forbidden ways about women, BIPOC, immigrants, LGBTQI+ people, calcifies into an ideology, providing boys and men with a false sense of community and purpose, which is often missing from our lives. /5
This lack of community and authentic human connection is beaten out of boys by the very domination based masculinity that now encourages them to seek community through violence and hate against others. /6
The problem isn't men or masculinity. It's our DOMINATION-BASED CULTURE OF MASCULINITY, wherein joyful loving boys are stripped of close friendships/connection and slotted into the performance of domination as the only acceptable path to masculine validation. *Man box culture* /7
The key to breaking the generational cycle of disconnection for boys and men is found in Niobe Way's research. Deep Secrets: Boys’ Friendships and the Crisis of Connection, lays out exactly when and how boys are convinced to give up close friendships and connection. /8
When we intercede on our children's behalf, interrupt the bullying messages of dominance-based masculine culture, boys and girls grow their connection and relational capacities, reaching a tipping point where our culture's ugly narrow gender stereotypes hold no appeal for them /9
The battle is now. On one side is rich authentic human connection. On the other side is our violent and traumatizing masculine culture of disconnection. Its up to us to replace our bullying isolating domination-based masculinity with a masculine culture of human connection. /10
I have written the Little #MeToo Book for Men, which lays out exactly how dominance-based masculine culture operates. This simple, 75 page book defines the path out of man box culture for men.
Get your copy here:…
Or here: /11
For parents/caregivers intent on growing our children's relational capacities, my partner Dr. Saliha Bava and I have written The Relational Book for Parenting. 200+ pages of games, stories and capacities to grow authentic human connection for our children.…
If radicalized white nationalism and Proud Boy punching initiations feel like belonging and community for boys, then we are utterly failing as fathers, parents, and communities to create and model a masculinity of connection for them.

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh

Keep Current with Mark Greene

Mark Greene Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!


Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @RemakingManhood

20 Nov
THREAD: Trump will only get worse. Domination culture allows authoritarian leaders one path forward. To keep doubling down on violence and domination. That's the entire repertoire of options. Trump and his base have declared war on our democratic institutions. It will not end. /1
We must understand the fundamental threat posed by Trump's authoritarians who now control the Republican party. White nationalism and authoritarianism dictate that they not only win, but destroy any who are not aligned with their racist, sexist agenda. This is the end game. /2
If we fail to investigate and prosecute the corruption, crimes, and human rights violations of the Trump administration our Republic is finished. /3
Read 8 tweets
19 Nov
NEW VIDEO: #AmericaNeedsGeorgia TURN VOLUME UP!!

With @Jeff_Daniels and the amazing @THORNETTAD

REAL CHANGE begins with @ossoff & @ReverendWarnock.

We need your help. We need 17,500 RETWEETS TODAY!
Just donated again. You can too! Donate now to win the Georgia Senate Runoffs and take back the Senate for Democrats via @actblue…
Read 4 tweets
6 Nov
Dominance-based authoritarians like Trump hold immense power until the moment in which it starts to slip away. Then they lose it with shocking speed as the cowards that supported him flee the legal and political ramifications of his actions. /1 Image
Because Trump's power is rooted in domination for its own sake, his actions will never be consistent. In fact, hypocrisy is central to how authoritarians assert their dominance, saying in effect, "I don't care what I said yesterday, I answer to no one." /2
Two things need to be understood. Trump is not the source of GOP authoritarianism. He is the figurehead. NEVER FORGET, because of it's collective four year silence the GOP INVESTED in Trump's strong man white nationalism, trading our democratic rights for his power grab. /3
Read 16 tweets
2 Nov
THREAD: Domination Culture is What the GOP is Selling --
We’re up against a deadly dangerous enemy, and we’re still asking the wrong questions.… /1
As the Republican Party leans more and more into what seem to be impossibly contradictory positions, we need to understand Trump’s base isn’t about what’s rational. It’s about the visceral pleasure of domination. /2
It was repellent to me, when, during the 2016 primary, Trump created nasty little nick names for every other GOP candidate. Back then, the first time I heard him call Marco Rubio “Little Marco” I was disgusted. This was straight up playground bully talk. /3
Read 32 tweets
25 Sep
THREAD: I Do the Housework --
Why millions of men can’t muster the empathy to understand this issue shocks me.… /1
I’m a college educated white male. I have a deeply satisfying professional/personal life. I’m responsible for washing dishes, cooking, cleaning bathrooms, laundry, and general house cleaning. There are days when it is joyful and there are days when it feels bleak/oppressive. /2
I can not imagine what lifetimes of this work felt like for women of my mother’s generation. Trapped doing decades of this relentless invisible work. How it must have driven many women mad. /3
Read 18 tweets
25 Sep
I'm primarily responsible for washing dishes, cooking, cleaning bathrooms, laundry, and general house cleaning. There are days when it is joyful and there are days when it feels bleak and oppressive. I CAN NOT IMAGINE what lifetimes felt like for women of my mother's generation.
Women of my mother's generation had a lifetime of this work forced on them, work which grew exponentially with each birth, many of which were unplanned. I'm looking at a few years of the current arrangement for a family of 3. My mother did it for 7 people for three decades.
If I had to stare down that 30 year tunnel, knowing full well my economic security hung in the balance, that my husband was missing in action much of the time, I'm not sure I would survive it. Men, do ALL the housework for a year. Only then will you understand what I'm getting at
Read 9 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!

This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us on Twitter!