My friend @heyrobkelly was recently sharing his own journey of being adopted as a kid, the power of being intentionally chosen and how it helped him from a young age experience God's love as a beloved chosen. Rob talked about going before a judge to be legally adopted...

1/
...And how he saw the judge as a positive person because the judge 'could do what I could not do for myself: use legal power and authority to place me in a family.'

Rob then went on to talk about the image in the Bible of God as judge.

2/
We focus on 'judgement' and giving an account etc, but Rob was reminding us that God as judge also means 'God can do for us what we cannot do: use God's authority to place us into a family.'

I was struck dumb by this and have been pondering it since.

3/
I have been to court a handful of times as a pastor. Most times it has been to sit with a domestic violence survivor, hoping the judge will protect her from the perpetrator.

Once I sat on the side of a murderer. The public defender had asked me to be there for support.

4/
It was incredibly uncomfortable to be associated with him. He was guilty, no doubt about it, and deserved to be judged for what he had done.

Regardless of what side I was on, I was placing a LOT of hope in that judge.

5/
I would pray, 'Please Lord, let the judge do what is right. Let there be justice here.'

But I would also often pray, 'please use the judge to protect the survivor from this DV perpetrator.'

Judges can protect and keep people free from perpetrators.

6/
As I have been reflecting on Rob's invitation to see 'God as judge' as a good thing, I keep bringing to mind all that a judge can do to keep us free and protected.

A judge can do for a DV survivor what she cannot do for herself and a judge can keep her free from abuse.

7/
People are sometimes shocked when I use a domestic violence metaphor to talk about chronic anxiety. It is an abuser with a message of doom and fear, it claims we must depend on it for wellbeing, we can never be free etc.

8/
It is why I am so passionate about the Gospel of Jesus. In stark contrast to chronic anxiety, The Gospel actually can set us free. God as judge can protect us from its message and threat.

9/
In Romans, Paul talks about sin A LOT. But 90% of the time for Paul, sin is a noun, not a verb. It is a condition we are in, not things we do.

And we desperately need a judge to free us from sin's abuse.

10/
When I teach this people think I am suggesting we aren't responsible. We are absolutely responsible. The journey of freedom for a DV survivor is the recognition of responsibility and then action.

11/
But still, a DV survivor, and us too, need a judge to legally protect us, keep us free from harm.

I am grateful to @heyrobkelly for opening this up for me. I will never see 'God as Judge' the same way.

12/12

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More from @stevecusswords

21 Dec
"Busted!"

I was walking into a store when a member of my congregation walking out saw me and yelled loudly with great delight, 'busted!! Ha ha ha!'

I stood there utterly puzzled. Her tone was playful and aggression of it really stopped me in my tracks.

1/
She saw my confusion and introduced herself as if I didn't know her. That added to my confusion. Her family has been at the church 10 years, serve, I have been highly involved in a crisis they had a few years back.

2/
So when she told me her name, it added to my confusion. Does she think I don't know who she is? I know her family well. I have been in some of their more challenging times.

But of course she interpreted my confusion as 'the pastor doesn't know me.'

3/
Read 15 tweets
19 Dec
Every generation holds a spiritual value different from the generation before. And we often arrogantly judge the previous generation for their value, because we see the temptation of it and the hypocrisy of it, but can be blind to our own.

1/
A Boomer visited our GenX college ministry class. He said, 'Always look like a preacher. Even if you are changing your oil and need to run to the store for more oil, shower, put on a suit and tie to buy the oil.'

We thought he was nuts. Actually, I still think it is nuts.

2/
But he was a Boomer. He valued personal holiness.

So his temptation was to 'look holy.'

While we judged him and then wildly swung the pendulum, the other way, we valued spiritual hunger more than we valued personal holiness.

3/
Read 6 tweets
9 Dec
John says 'perfect love casts out fear.'

Perfect love displaces fear. I think fear can displace our awareness and experience of perfect love. It cannot displace God's love, but it sure can displace our awareness of it.

1/
Knowing you're in anxiety's grip is actually not as easy as we think. We tend to bear down and try harder instead of pausing.

One way to notice it: you are no longer aware of God's presence and God's love.

It could be that your anxiety has displaced your awareness.

2/
Warning Signs:

- you start to think it is all on you/all on your shoulders.
- 'if it is to be, it is up to me.' An anxious statement if ever I heard one.
- An impending feeling of doom or hopelessness.
- Rigid thinking, either-or locked in thinking.
- double binding.

3/
Read 12 tweets
4 Dec
The Inner Critic.

Ugh.

Its hard to dislodge the power and influence the IC has over us. Here is a helpful tool:

1. Find at least one other who cares about you and get together.

1/
2. Have your friend write down the messages your IC tells you as you share it.

3. Then ask her/him to write the adjectives of these messages, ex: 'harsh,' 'unrelenting,' 'condemning.' etc.

So now you have the actual messages on one line and descriptors on the other.

2/
4. Now write the descriptors of God's character and God's posture toward you. Patient, loving, kind etc.

5. What if I were at least as ________ to myself as God is.

3/
Read 18 tweets
3 Dec
I've been doing more study on the constant critic(s) that every church leader deals with. Its amazing how a steady group of 2-5 critics can really tax a leader's health and impact them way beyond their numbers. ie, more than 3 feels like 'legion' to a leader.

1/
All vocations face criticism of course.

I wonder if church criticism is unique because:

a) church leaders tend to conflate personal identity and church health more than most.

b) critics falsely think they know about leading a church because they attend a church.

2/
For example, doctors and teachers face criticism. People come into a Doc with diagnosis from Internet etc. But I wonder if attending and serving in a church makes someone more confident that they know when they really don't know.

3/
Read 13 tweets
12 Nov
My chaplain supervisor said, 'The ER doesn't cause the dynamic in a family, it simply reveals and then heightens what it already there.'

Close families got closer, tense ones got worse.

1/
My early reps in Family Systems Theory were about reading the family dynamic in the first 3 minutes.

Once you learn to notice anxiety between people, it is amazing how quickly you can notice healthly or toxic dynamics.

2/
I think COVID is the equivalent of the ER. It isn't causing starved souls in pastors, it is revealing the condition of our soul health and amplifying it.

This can feel threatening but is actually a gift.

3/
Read 11 tweets

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