It’s a fascinating psychological insight that some people can:
- see actual people doing an actual thing
BUT
- be more afraid of people who are not actually doing it, but who they fear could hypothetically do it
Fearing a concept of a person more than the actions of another person

That’s a phobia isn’t it?
I’m trying to imagine Caroline Lucas setting light to a forest and me thinking “I’d rather she did that, than I imagined Boris Johnson doing it”
How do you come back from this? I don’t know how we back down from becoming further and further extremes

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More from @lauralexx

9 Jan
I’m quite drunk. I’m overall very sad at the moment. I’m stuck in a crevice of loathing lockdown entirely whilst also screaming for a stricter one because if we could only do it properly short and sharp we could end it all and go back to normal.
I feel really stuck between the voices I hear: yeah, I want common sense and I want to go back to normal. But, if common sense is:
a) just kill everyone below average strength
b) lock us all down hard and short

Then I choos (b)
But I’m stuck in a reality where the unbelievable decision being taken is (c): lockdown long and sloppy, kill a lot of people, incite furious arguments and dissent, kill the livelihoods of those lucky enough to survive
Read 15 tweets
22 Sep 20
If there's a second lockdown, I would like to be the first to start all the jokes from last time again...
- Can I still get Covid-19 if I didn't see the first 18?
- January has 31 days, February has 28, March has 3924
- Cor bloody Joe Wicks
- mmmmmm banana bread/yuck banana bread
ermigerd imagine if GBBO has a banana bread technical? THE SCENES! An entire nation screaming about recipes from their crumb covered sofas
"YOU SIMPLY MUST MASH THE BANANAS YOUNG COMPETITOR WHO WILL GO OUT IN WEEK 5 DUE TO HAVING HAIRBRAINED IDEAS ABOUT CINNAMON FROM THAT 2 WEEKS YOU SPENT IN ASIA THAT ONE TIME"
Read 12 tweets
18 Sep 20
If cowardly is not wanting uninvited interactions with dull pedants who insert themselves insultingly into light conversations in order to wank all over the perceived moral high ground THEN PAINT MY BELLY YELLOW AND POUR ME INTO A FRAIDY CAT COSTUME
“You don’t want to talk to me so therefore you must be afraid of my truth. I am powerful.” He said, in his most powerful keyboard baritone.

She looked at the words, lying bare across the screen and hesitated. Perhaps he was right?

But he wasn’t so she got on with her day
She looked at him across the internet, ‘he must be exhausted. it’s tiring work finding conversations between two women he doesn’t know and finding a way to twist them into a superiority complex.’ If only he knew someone in real life who could bring him a refreshing juice drink
Read 8 tweets
17 Sep 20
The sort of people that complain at TV comedy would have their brains fall out of their arseholes if they ever walked into a live comedy club and saw what was said there
"Free speech is dead!" say people who only watch people talk through several filters of production and broadcast.

"Free speech is dead!" say people complaining about people speaking freely in disagreement with themselves
"The trouble is it just isn't REMOTELY funny." say people watching from a silent room, in a bad mood, trying not enjoy it with other people who also prefer moaning to laughing. The remote is tantalisingly out of reach, as is the front door
Read 4 tweets
17 Sep 20
It’s been 8 weeks and the terrible songs I’m making up about my dog are showing no signs of abating. Send help. This is the day Don Mclean warned about
IT’S MAKI, MAKI
THE WORST DOG IN THE WORLD
SHE EATS THE STINKY FOOD
THEN SHE PLOPS IT IN THE GARDEN AND ITS VERY VERY RUDE
ITS MAKI MAKI
THE WORST DOG IN THE WORLD
- This is sung to a mishmash of every tune you can piece together and in an unpleasant falsetto that makes her cock her head to one side
Read 4 tweets
16 Sep 20
Buffy The Vampire Slayer: we’re 2 series in and I still hate Xander. I’m trying not to be too “leftie snowflake killjoy” but his character is super unpleasant to watch? Sort of possessive, controlling, jealous and insecure? I hope he grows up well
Hes basically A less sassy Gunnar from Nashville if you like me enjoy seriously trashy box sets
MORE sassy sorry. MORE sassy. Gunnar is not sassy. He is a DRRRRIP. He thinks he’s Matt Saracen but he isn’t. God I miss Friday Night Lights
Read 5 tweets

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