Thread by @dyllyp

My Twitter account is a direct extension of my behavior throughout my academic career. I basically went to school to bully bullies. I relish it.

When my mom enrolled me in a private school, those white boys were licking their chops when they saw this little black kid with glasses walk down the hall. Thing is, I was immune. I grew up in a family where shit talking was our love language. We clowned each other 24/7.

So when these bullies tried to make fun of me, I had home court advantage. Remember that scene in the Dark Knight where Bane was kicking Batman’s ass in the dark?

“Ah you think your jokes are funny? You merely adopted the jokes. I was born in it, molded by it.”

That frustration of not being able to pick on me verbally often led to physical violence. And I’d be lying if I said I won every fight. I didn’t lose many either though. But when a kid half their size wasn’t willing to back down, that gave these dudes some pause.

I actually tweeted about one of those interactions a few months ago lol.

Thread:

https://twitter.com/dyllyp/status/1260297750307995648

I was getting in fights almost every week because they’d say something racist, I’d clown them in front of the class, their egos would get bruised, they’d start throwing punches and I’d always oblige. Rinse, repeat.

But they were always the victims, so I got suspended/expelled.

There was one incident in 8th grade, where I embarrassed a kid so bad he brought his older brother, a college student. Dude pulled up after school and beat me up pretty good. When I got home with a two black eyes, my uncle Nelson asked me what happened and he was livid.

The thing is, unc played fullback for the Pittsburgh Steelers. He was 6’5” 250. Easy. They literally called him the Findlay Freighter.

The next day, unc says he wants to pick me up from school. I tell him, please don’t. Wasn’t negotiable.

So I get outta class and I’m walking towards the lot. Kid and his brother show up again. But before bro can put his hands on me I see a blacked out BMW pull up on the curb.

Long story short: Unc picks this kid up by his throat and tells him if he touches me again he’d rip his arms and beat his little brother with them.

And that was the end of that.

Anyway, if you’re in Clarksville, TN and you’re looking for a new car, Unc co-owns a Wyatt Johnson Kia dealership.

Tell him Dylan sent ya and he’ll take care of you like he took care of me.

That’s easily my best M. Night Shyamalan story-ending.