Another year, another time to #TimetoTalk day. This year I'd like to talk about mess and discomfort. One element of stigma is feeling like you carry a story and history that will never be understood and never be possible to integrate with the lives and stories of everyone else
If there's a #TimetoTalk day, there should also be a #timetolisten day. And listening means learning to live with stories that discomfort, stories that trail off, stories that ask questions you can't answer. Mental ill-health is a fucking mess to live with.
The experiences people share around mental ill-health will not conform to your wider narrative expectations. The job of making our stories make sense that we have who live through them is not the same job that a person listening has. #timetotalk isn't about you
If someone's experiences differ so much from your own, do you know how to listen when someone feels it's #timetotalk? They might be telling you for any of a million reasons. They aren't confessing, even if the circumstances you help create makes it feel like they are
If you are not used to hearing people talk about their own mental ill-health, you will be offended by how messy their story feels if they decide it's #timetotalk. They may be telling you for a whole variety of reasons. Very few to do with 'smashing stigma'
Talking about our own mental ill-health to be 'out and proud' is different from talking about oour mental ill-health because we need to for specific reason. #timetotalk for people isn't storytime. It's sometimes a request to you, even if neither party knows what's being asked for
Listening to someone's story of mental ill-health isn't about raising your own awareness of issues. That's a byproduct. Don't sit and much popcorn when people feel it's #timetotalk. But also don't think you are the agent to get in and fix the story. Fix what you can in the world
I think the largest thing I can say to say is: don't relate to the story on #timetotalk day. Relate to the person. It's not about 'what you would do or feel'. It's about what that person needs, feels or is going through. You can be very kind, very respectful and still stigmatise
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
