So anyway.

The Twin Jades are both subs.

I said what I said.
They don't know this about each other for AGES! Because they were brought up in a way where you don't talk about this stuff with family!!

But one night, long after their respective marriages, their husbands are out.

They hired a babysitter for the kids.
They're planning on having a nice brotherly hang-out session. Just gonna watch some movies on the couch and have a lil chat. Decompress after a long work week.

...They wind up getting wine-drunk.
And suddenly, they're talking EXTREMELY CANDIDLY about what sort of bedroom stuff they're into.

What are your preferred ropes and restraints? Ever tried shibari? What are your thoughts on humiliation play? Open-handed spanking or getting hit with a crop: which is superior?
And probably there are some very emotional moments where they're hugging each other, like, "YOUR HUSBAND BETTER PROVIDE YOU WITH GOOD AFTERCARE OR I WILL HAVE WORDS FOR HIM. 😤 TELL ME IF HE EVER FAILS TO RESPECT YOUR SAFEWORD."
...It's awkward the next morning.

Now they Know Some Things about their brother's marriage. They would frankly prefer not to have this kind of information, but oops.

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More from @cicerfics

4 Mar
Got the Bunji brainworms, so you're all gonna suffer with me.

LWJ is a shapeshifter! He forcibly shifts into bunny form whenever he gets too exhausted/sick/overextended. Sometimes, it takes him a while to recuperate enough to shift back.
One week, he lets himself get overtired with his job.

Oopsie! He's suddenly a fluffy white bunny!

Now, he could manage this situation if he were at home. It's happened before.
He has a little alert system rigged up so he can contact his brother and let him know he's stuck as a bunny.

LXC will come over to collect him. He'll take LWJ to his home and look after him for a few days. He'll call LWJ's workplace, too, and let them know he's "out sick".
Read 144 tweets
2 Mar
I was rewatching CQL episode 3 to clarify a plot-point for a fic. And I got to that scene where LWJ and LXC are talking in the gardens.

And I am once again SCREAMING over LXC looking his baby brother in the face and saying, "I sometimes wonder if I was too strict with you."
SIR?!

YOU?!

The most indulgent older sibling in Ancient Fantasy China?!

You think you might have been TOO STRICT?!
LXC has exactly three modes:

#1 - Spoil my didi

#2 - Tease my didi

#3 - Protect my didi

That's it. That's all he's capable of. He's got nothing else to give.
Read 6 tweets
27 Feb
Back on my mpreg bullshit, and once again thinking about pregnant!LWJ.

I like to think that he would be one of those people who is just ENORMOUS when pregnant.
Absolutely huge belly.

He stops being able to see his feet when he's about five months along. By month 7, he struggles to get out of a soft couch/bed without help.

His babies are always nine pounds, minimum. Just huge chonky little whoppers of a newborn.
Fat babies! I just think wangxian should have fat little roly-poly babies. Huge cheeks and chubby limbs.

Just.

One of those babies where you look at them, and all you can think is, "THAT IS A FAT LITTLE DUMPLING, RIGHT THERE.

wangxian always make fat babies send tweet
Read 4 tweets
26 Feb
Absolutely obsessed with the idea of LWJ as a nude model for art classes.
Anyone who knows him would be SHOOK to find out he does this as a side-gig. Because he doesn't seem like the type?

But it's actually very impersonal! He's nothing more than a collection of muscles and sinews, shapes and angles, to these artists. It's not erotic or weird at all.
And they love him at the studio! Because:

1) He's drop-dead gorgeous

and

2) He can hold still for literally hours

He's an absolutely stellar live model.
Read 101 tweets
26 Feb
I am once again thinking of beautiful black widow LWJ, in a birdcage veil, smoking from a cigarette holder as he tells the police officer that yes, he is so distraught over his wealthy husband's untimely demise.

Shattered.

Simply crushed.
Anyway. 'Pearls for a Funeral' really awakened something in me, and I'm extremely sad that there isn't more noir-inspired fic for this fandom.

(Link for the uninitiated! archiveofourown.org/works/28822083)
...Absolutely no one asked, BUT.

In the version of this story that lives in my head, WRH forced LWJ to marry him for some complex political/financial reasons.

The Lans were not in a position to refuse, or else their business would've been utterly destroyed by WRH's empire.
Read 8 tweets
26 Feb
Absolutely love when I'm walking down the sidewalk and I encounter a crow.

Because that crow is obviously not going to move for a PEON like me. It just does a grudging little sideways shuffle, and then goes back to eating whatever detritus it found.
Most wild animals are like, "oh shit oh FUCK a human ohgodohgod!!" And they scramble away as fast as they can.

Not crows!

"FLY away? Oh, honey. It's adorable you think you're worth that kind of effort. 💅 I will scoot six (6) inches to the side, and you will have to make do."
You're so right, little dude. I am not worth it! Don't fly away for the likes of me!

Fucking suburb, you funky little corvids. ♥️
Read 4 tweets

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