Thread by @iowahawkblog

I'm no marketing expert, but I'm not sure VASECTOMY MAYHEM is the best urology clinic branding strategy

https://twitter.com/DarrenHeitner/status/1369362998784036867

Try to imagine lying down on a paper covered padded table, everything but your junk masked off, and the doctor bursts in with a WWE entrance, swinging a chainsaw in the dry ice and strobe lights

I usually save this for parties, but when I had my vasectomy a fire broke out. On my crotch. True story

*Part of the procedure involves cauterization. Anyway, I'm lying there, staring at the ceiling and trying to think of England, when I feel the doctor sweep something off my groinage area, and hear STOMP STOMP STOMP

**turns out he had started a surgical sponge on fire with the cauterizing whatchamacallit, and had to stomp it out. And this wasn't even the most alarming thing that happened during the event. (Details for subscribers only)

***but I will say it turned out successfully, I have not let another person within 20 feet of my nards ever since