2n
Yes. Rivers have birthdays now. I went back the next day. “Can I have the beer now?”
He handed me two bottles. I was on my way home. The police stopped me looking awfully serious.
“Sir. We have received intel that you have alcohol in your car” said the police inspector.
👇
3n
“Yes. But I did not consume any before I started to drive”.
“That does not matter. You are now holding a bottle within 5 km of the river Narmada. Get out of your car”.
I got out. Another constable came and murmured something into the inspector’s ears.
...
👇
4n
“Sorry sir. You can go”.
I was surprised and asked him why.
“We have just been informed that due to scanty rainfall, the river boundary has shifted around 5 meters. You are in the safe zone”.
“Phew. Thanks sir. I will go straight home and drink only there”.
👇
5n
“OK. Please don’t drive by MG Road. We have another check-post there. That is within 500 meters of a school. Don’t take Rajiv Chowk either. That is within 200 meters of a place of worship. You can get caught”.
“OK. So what should I do now?”
...
👇
6n
“Take SV Road for now. Also go home and download the beta version of the ‘Google Maps’ app. They now have ‘TIPPLE routes’. Red for traffic jam, Blue for smooth, Yellow for slow moving and Brown for the No Alcohol ‘Dry’ zone.
These are now UPDATED in real time basis”.
👇
7n
I reached home and opened my bottle. Suddenly the bell rang. It was the police again.
“Now what?”
“Sir. We have received intelligence that you have alcohol in your house”.
👇
8n
“Yes. But I am not within 500 meters of anything and the Ganges, Narmada, Kaveri, Indus, even the bloody Mithi River is more than 5 km away”.
“Sir. Rules are rules. We have to check if you are old enough.”
I showed him my PAN card.
👇
9n
“Sorry sir. This won’t work. Too many fake IDs out there. Did you know there were 4 lakh fake students in schools in UP.
Pls place your hand on this machine so that we can authenticate. It is all biometric now”.
I placed my rt thumb on sensor. A red light started flashing.
👇
10n
“Sorry sir. We will have to confiscate your beer!”
“Now what? I have complied with all the rules” I protested.
“Sir. New rule of yesterday. Mars is in the 5th house of your Almanac. Alcohol sold to anyone whose Mars is weighing on his Rahu in the 4th house is illegal".
👇
11n
“How the hell do you know that?”
“Sir UID. Your ‘kundli’ is now linked to your Aadhaar card”.
😝😜😂
Por favor a venerable veteran Beer aficionado!
• • •
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A touching account about Sam Bahadur ...
From a portion of a mail written by a Military Doctor about the Late Field Marshal SHFJ Manekshaw.
The doc in question, Maj Gen BNBM Prasad, a noted pulmonologist who had spent nearly five years with the Field Marshal before his death.
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2
In his own words ...
"On June 22, 2008, barely five days before his death, I received info that Sam Bahadur has been admitted to the MH, Wellington & has asked for me. I flew to Chennai from Delhi and then travelled by road to Wellington ...
👇
3
It was quite late when i arrived but I went directly to him. He opened his eyes and asked: "Col Prasad, how are you? Have you had a drink yet?"
I replied: "We will have a drink together after you get better."
...
👇
1. Have a firm handshake. 2. Look people in the eye. 3. Sing in the shower. 4. Own a great stereo system. 5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard. 6. Keep secrets. 7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.
👇
2n
8. Always accept an outstretched hand. 9. Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. 10. Whistle. 11. Avoid sarcastic remarks. 12. Choose your life's mate carefully. From this ONE decision will come 90% of all your happiness or misery.
👇
3n
13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out. 14. Lend only those books you never care to see again. 15. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have. 16. When playing games with children, let them win.