Thread by @SiriuslyCold

So there's this huge flood one day, and an entire town looks like it's going to be swallowed up by the waters. And the Police and Rescue Agencies are running all over the place trying to get people to safety.

So they send the rescue boat over to this house where a guy's sitting on the roof with the water lapping around his ankles and they say "Come on, quickly, there isn't much time"
To which he says "Nah, it's ok, God will provide"

About an hour later they're zooming past in the boat again and they notice the guy's still there, only the water's up to his waist... "Quick" they say, get in the boat, it's going to get worse before it gets better.
"Nah, don't worry - God will provide"

An hour after that a rescue helicopter flies over the area and notices the guy, who must be standing on the peak of the roof now, with only his head and shoulders visible. "GRAB THE ROPE!" they cry "IT'S YOUR ONLY HOPE!"

"Don't worry" he replies calmly "God will provide."

So he drowned of course. And he goes to heaven, and is a little ticked off with God, and expresses his concern saying "I had FAITH, I BELIEVED in you - and still you didn't help me"

"HELP YOU?!" God replies "What MORE did you want - I sent you two boats and a helicopter!"