Wake up in Britainland

Turn on GB news for Breakfast rage against the refugees with Katie Hopkins. Turn my kettle to 189 Fahrenheit and empty 4oz of coffee into my 3-hands width chuckle-brothers mug. It will be a good day in the mines.
Its 4 cubits past eleventy, and mandatory tea and national anthem break. We salute statue of Moggmentum and pay pride tax. Lunch of carrot and a crown pint. In afternoon we get ready for book inspection, no forrin names. Ride daily bus home.
Radio tuned to Priti Patel reading list of dissident children as red-faced men spittle in displaced rage from their failed marriages. Dinner is wetherspoons fine british slurry. 8pm curfew apart from drinkers, got to level up. Rishi sunak patrols westminster to check.
Bed time. I fall asleep to the soothing tones of Dan Wootton brushing his teeth whilst singing old oasis songs. The moon is sponsored by treacle. Fall asleep under my bojo quilt. I hear neighbours dying of dysentery. Another freedom.
In corner blue passport watches knowingly. I miss my wife, but god bless the queen. Tomorrow is international "pro-life" day where Mogg whips pregnant women from a horse. Michael Gove is under my bed. I accidently think of france, and my fate is sealed.
Wake in offshore asylum prison.
Hundreds of screens play clip of Patel smirking. I am forced to make tracksuit bottoms. This is life. The sun raises 47 acres, and the ghost of Thatcher watches in glee.

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More from @drjanaway

16 Sep
Looking forward to 'more British shows on TV. I have a few pitches:

'Queues and views.'

Piers Morgan interviews people in the Greggs queue about controversial political issues and then storms out. Celebrity guests include Johnny Vegas and Larry the Cat

#Britishness
'Great teas of the Island'

The ghost of Maggie Thatcher invades the homes of pensioners and ensures they are not drinking PG tips. Episode one includes Judi Dench performing an exorcism. Music provided by Ed Sheeran.
'Priti Patel; Refugee roundup'

A documentary series follows the beleaguered home secretary as she teams up with the 'Clandestine threat commander' to chase asylum seekers with a large net. Sponsored by Wetherspoons. Music by Morrisey.
Read 9 tweets
14 Sep
Seeing alot of people confused about #NaturalImmunity vs #vaccineinducedimmunity vs #passiveimmunity with regard to #covid19.

Hope this helps clear it up (some good explanation here)

- Pleb ImageImage
Alot of it has been "we have a natural immunity to covid 19." This is only true, as per above, if we have been infected with it. We don't have a natural immunity without exposure, just the ability to develop it. And not all immunity is total.
Someone referring to the acute phase response (i.e the initial non-specific response, fever etc) is referring to part of the immune response, but the term "natural immunity" refers to this priming process as explained above. In covid 19,acute phase response is not enough for many
Read 4 tweets
12 Jul
Reflections on last night: #eng #racism

We did an incredible job getting to the final, scenes not seen for a generation. A diverse team championing what England aspires to be, a progressive collective moving toward a shared goal. Each earning more than their keep.
I applaud each of them, but special mention must go to @BukayoSaka87 , @MarcusRashford, and @Sanchooo10 who have not only represented a community of people under duress from common people and elites alike, but shown that ascendence to greatness is individual.
Reading the words of @GarethSouthgate from earlier this year, it is clear that the @England team is very much forward-thinking in tackling #racism and he, himself, a great and empathetic leader, is forthright in tackling, against potential anger, this great cause.
Read 25 tweets
10 Jul
RIP Martha
Aug 1998 - July 2021

Loved, loving, and never forgotten.

Passed calmly in my arms this afternoon after a long and valued life.

One's soul can be hurt, but never lost. And one's heart broken, but always filled.

Love you baby girl. Image
She was brave until the end. Braver than me. Hardest thing I have had to do, but no less than she deserved.

In my heart always.
Thankyou all for the kind comments. I was as ready as I could be, never enough.

But before she went she looked into my eyes and I saw a calm pass over her.

She went in shared love.

X
Read 4 tweets
26 May
How to deal with pseudoscience in health: right vs wrong.

Wrong: thats charlatan bullshit and you are being manipulated.

Right: I see this is important to you and lets discuss it, and after I will support your choice. Tell me..
Alot of pseudoscience, especially in health, relies on linking superficially plausible ideas together to create a mechanism to address a need. The individual components of the mechanism may be believable, or have some romantic or mystic notion that appeals to us..
For example in homeopathy, "like treats like" has a romantic appeal, and can seem intuitive in a "test or train the system" view, and does work in vaccines (ish,) but actually has no evidence as working for most things. It is the idea that holds appeal, not evidence.
Read 13 tweets
23 May
Its fairly clear at this point that Priti Patel is simply a front for a growing toxic and xenophobic policy designed to appeal to a media-polarised rightwing nationalism. So it always goes in the face of adversity we mistake restriction of liberty for order.
It is tiring to live in a country with so much potential, built on a history of immigration and hard-won battles for equal rights, to see an 18th century masturbatory fantasy lead our vote and policy against us. The world is changing, and Britain is an old fortress on sand.
Its simple really;

There is an idea of Britain, an old stubborn workhorse of moral authority who can be relied on to right the world.

Then there is the reality of a country split by poverty, fuelled by a divisive and malignant media and run by a cabal of isolated sycophants.
Read 6 tweets

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