My wife cheated on me.

// thread
I called my wife's office during lunch. Her boss answered the phone.

"Hey George, she just left. Can I leave a message?"

"No. I'll call later."

"I LOVE the flowers you sent her."

(awkward pause)


Except...I hadn't sent her flowers.
My mind raced.

"Maybe she bought herself flowers?"
"Maybe her mom sent her flowers?"
"Maybe ... Fuck ... maybe she's cheating?"
I met her at University my junior year, she was a freshman.

I liked her.
She was beautiful.
I was in it for the sex.

As the year came to an end, my plan was to break up as soon as there was some geographic distance.

During finals week, she came to my apartment "to talk".
"I'm pregnant."
We didn't see a lot of options.

I don't remember seeking wise counsel.

I felt alone and terrified of being a father.

3 months later we were married and both dropped out of school to get jobs to pay for a tiny, shitty apartment.
Life was hard.

Brutally hard.

Yes, there's a lot of opportunity in the U.S., but it's also expensive. Especially if you have no idea how to manage what little money you have.

At one point I was working 3 jobs.
I sold real estate during the day,
I waited tables at a Mexican restaurant at night,
And I delivered newspapers at 4am.

It was 5 years later that I called her office and learned about the flowers.
I didn't have the courage to ask her about it when she got home. I'm not sure what I was waiting for.

As soon as I was sure she was asleep, I emptied her purse on the living room floor. I don't know what I was looking for.

Evidence of an affair I guess.
And then I found a card from the florist, "I love you".

It wasn't signed.
I don't remember if I loved her at this point, but I told her I was willing to try to make it work.

We both cried.

She told me she was sorry.

But it was too late.
At our first counselling session, the therapist told us, "If you both want to make this work, it will work. If one of you does not, it won't."

She was in too deep. She chose the other guy...who was also married.

3 months later, we divorced.
Divorce felt like a death.
Divorce felt like I had a stain on who I was (not true by the way)
Divorce felt lonely as hell.
So what's the lesson?

Holy shit, there are a busload of lessons.
• Don't date someone you don't plan to marry.

• Have sex with your wife, not with a bunch of girlfriends.

(I know you don't like this advice, but trust me. It becomes baggage you'll eventually have to deal with.)
• Be intentional with your relationships.

You don't luck into a happy relationship.

Know what you want your marriage to look like.

Break it down into ways you can make that happen.

And then follow the damn plan.
• Have boundaries you both agree on.

I'm never alone with another woman and she's never alone with another man.
• Find and take responsibility for your part in the failed marriage.


If you don't recognize your part, it's bound to repeat itself.

My part?

Premarital sex.
I got married to someone I didn't love.
I had horrible habits with money.
I wasn't home enough.
• Divorce doesn't define you.
Two years later, after a lot of personal growth, I met the love of my life.

We've been married 23 years.
Follow me @OneGSisneros.

Scroll to the top and retweet so this post can find the right person.

I write 2 threads a week. Hit the notifications 🔔 so you don't miss any.

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More from @OneGSisneros

29 Sep
"What if I fail?"
"What if she says no?"
"What if I let them down?"

Is fear is running your life?

// thread 🧵 Image
In the beginning, living with fear can be comfortable.

As long as you don't do anything crazy, fear doesn't go crazy himself.

But we all know, it never lasts.

Fear gets greedy.
An open letter to Fear,

by Elizabeth Gilbert author of Big Magic
Read 12 tweets
27 Sep
I'm a 55 year old who gained 10,000 followers on Twitter in just 6 months.

This is my story.

// thread
In 2012 we sold everything and moved from the United States to a small mountain village in Guatemala.

We sold our dream home.
We sold 2 successful businesses.
We sold all the kids toys.
Over a beer, my friend Bryan asked, "How can you do that to your kids bro? The U.S. is the best country in the world. You're really taking all that away???"

My wife and I lost some of our best friends in the move.
Read 16 tweets
23 Sep
Webster’s Dictionary is wrong. Marriage isn’t a noun, it’s a verb.

How to get through your first year.

//a thread
You can't plant a seed (or a marriage) and expect it to bear fruit the next day...or the next month or even the next year.

It doesn’t work that way.
I talked to my dad last night and he asked about the apple trees we planted last spring.

“We're getting a little fruit dad. A couple of apples. It’s still not the best fruit though. The best fruit will come in 2-3 years.”

You can't rush seeds.
Read 15 tweets
22 Sep
"83% Of All Marriages Are Unhappy"

My wife gives her very best advice to get you into the top 17%

// thread
I NEVER EVER talk poorly about him behind his back. I always lift him up. No matter what.

Women are black belts in this. Stop it.
I'm interested in what he's doing.

He goes through phases.

• early in our marriage he trained for triathlons
• then went through a poker phase
• now, it's Twitter.

I love it. (And I love that I get to post on his page today)
Read 24 tweets
21 Sep
How To Become a Better Version of Yourself,
[ tactics I've gathered since 1966 ]

Stay away from ALL news

This will save you YEARS of your life.
The news has nothing for you.
Nothing you can't live without.

"But who will I vote for?"
Flip a coin.

"But what about the Pandemic?"
Wear a mask or don't wear a mask.

Get on with your life.
Curate your social media

• don't follow shitty people
• follow inspirational accounts
• follow people who teach you something

If you find yourself scrolling and getting lost, delete the app.

[ Follow me @OneGSisneros ]
Read 15 tweets
15 Sep
I'm 55 years old and I have ONE regret in life.

If I could have ONE do-over, I know exactly what it would be.

// thread
I grew up in the mountains of Vail, Colorado. My high school not only had a football team, we had ski team!

At the end of the season of my senior year, I missed going to State in cross-country skiing, by just a few points.
My biggest regret, my ONLY regret, is NOT that I didn’t make it to State,

It’s that I didn’t even try, and that's why I didn't qualify.
Read 15 tweets

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