I am so tired of people with privilege telling marginalized folks how they should feel about their oppression.
I’m also tired of people from marginalized groups being the first ones to jump up and say “I don’t feel oppressed/etc. by the stuff others marginalized folks do.”
Some of y’all really be on some pick me nonsense.
Being callous to other people’s suffering really isn’t the flex that you think it is.
If something don’t bother you, fine. But can you at least shut up and let the people who are hurt talk? Why do you gotta show out?
Y’all are so quick to dismiss people’s experiences and feelings and I just don’t get it?
There are a lot of folks with whom I share a social position that I disagree with. I’ve seen a lot of people go to the mat over stuff that I couldn’t care less about. But I still listen.
There have been times that I’ve felt like people from my same social position might be doing the most about something that really ain’t that serious for me.
Instead of acting like some kinda pick me, I keep my mouth shut and LISTEN.
And when it comes to people with less privilege than me, I’ve learned that it’s best to keep my mouth shut and what? Listen.
Nobody is saying that you have to agreement is mandatory, but can y’all at least listen first?
Some of y’all act so scared that if we make sure that people who get beat down by society actually feel safe for a change, that suddenly you’re gone lose all your privilege.
Every time people who are treated like crap by society ask for just a little of the weight to be taken off their shoulders, here y’all come acting like somebody is taking something from you.
If you want to oppress people with no consequences, just say that.
It’s wild that people and communities will set boundaries and assert their right to decide how people should treat them, and y’all get mad and itch about how you should get to treat people however you want.
But then don’t let somebody pull your privilege card because then all the sudden you care about being treated with dignity snd respect.
Do you know what we call people who intentionally violate and disregard boundaries?
Abusers. We call them abusers.
And some of y’all want to be one so badly.
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Personality tests are great for helping us understand ourselves and others, though I think that it’s important to note that their pop psychology bint can make them hard to take seriously, especially if the tests aren’t well crafted.
And then there’s the white supremacy…
In ministry circles, the personality tests that I’ve run into the most are Meyers-Briggs, the DISC, and the most popular one right now…the Enneagram. About 20yrs ago, people also talked about the four humors: phlegmatic, sanguine, choleric, and melancholic. I’m not sure…
What rest was associated with the latter, but I remember people trying to type me according to those thing yeas ago…I was a psych major back then and v confused.
Note: I’m talking personality tests and not “spiritual gifts” assessments. Big difference.
Yesterday I celebrated sixteen years of marriage. I want to attempt to offer sixteen pieces of unsolicited relationship advice that’s worked for us…
1. Avoid people for whom marriage or being in a relationship is a personality trait, because they are frequently toxic.
I know this will make some folk mad, but I mean it. If they don’t have a personality besides talking about marriage, they are unhealthy.
2. Use your words. The other person doesn’t know how you feel unless you tell them. They shouldn’t have to guess or divine. If you can’t use words establish a clear line of communication.
As an Episcopalian, I really try not to talk bad about my Anglican siblings in the ACNA because I came into Anglicanism after the split and I did not live through the tense times and really don’t think it’s a good look for me to critique them because of how some might perceive it
I am going to make an exception to my general rule right now, because…well.
So while y’all were out here worried about what the Southern Baptists might say and do, the Anglican Church in North America somehow managed to our SBC the SBC.
I don’t know who was in the room advising the ACNA Archbishop when he formulated his remarks at their Provincial meeting this past week (which seems to be at the same time as the SBC, ironically), but this ain’t it fam.
Alright alright alright. I have tried to limit how and when I speak in any kind of capacity regarding @TheWitnessBCC, a Black Christian non-profit of which I am the Vice President. My platform and opinions are my own and I try to compartmentalize...until I can’t. So here goes...
In March, @TheWitnessBCC launched our #LeaveLOUD content focus. Our founder, our President, and I shared our stories of leaving white Christian organizations and churches. We have published articles on our website and distributed other media as part of this content focus.
#LeaveLOUD is BY Black Christians, is FOR Black Christians, and is ABOUT who? BLACK CHRISTIANS.
We understand that a lot of our white siblings, particularly #exvangelicals, have resonated with this movement on some level. Not mad at it.
My spiritual practices are what have kept me grounded during this difficult time. Is there interest in a thread where I share some of my spiritual practices?
FYI: These are Christian practices, but there might be some things that anyone can find useful.
Ok so there is definitely interest. I’m pretty sure y’all will get tired of it but here we go.
I again want to state that these practices and some of my recs that go with them are overtly Christian but some can be adapted.
So first of all, I am a dyed in the wool Pentecostal and Charismatic that has become an Episcopalian. I have some intersections with the Baptist, Lutheran, and AME traditions. I was introduced to more of the Catholic and Orthodox traditions while I was in seminary.
As a lot of y’all know, I grew up in a small rural town in the Midwest.
I was at my 15th year high school reunion a couple years ago, which was on the patio of one of the local taverns.
Suddenly a country song started to play and EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE, started losing their minds. Now there had been OTHER country songs playing. But people lost their minds after the first note on this one.
Me, being the lone negro (none of my other black classmates were there but anyway), started looking around for an explanation. I even looked to my husband, who also grew up in my town and is white but seriously uncultured, and he seemed to know what the song was.