Thread by @Dreamweasel

INTRODUCING COLBY, THE COMPLETELY FICTIONAL LIBERAL WHO EXISTS SOLELY IN THE MINDS OF FOX NEWS VIEWERS

COLBY: I want COVID restrictions to last forever, because I hate personal freedom & I love government control

R: I see

COLBY: I am also OBSESSED with forcing CRT on children

COLBY: It pains me to see any acknowledgment of gender differences at all, and I have made it my life’s mission to change our nation’s laws to accommodate the whims of transgender people

R: Laying it on pretty thick, aren’t you

COLBY: And I’m still REALLY mad that Hillary lost

R: It’s going to be a challenge to make your caricature distinguishable from what we actually think of you

COLBY: Don’t worry, I will fight tooth & nail to prevent any knowingly droll remarks, because humor is my Kryptonite

R: So much for the tolerant Left

COLBY: I CANCEL THEE

COLBY: I think America should have open borders because I want white people to be demographically overpowered and eventually bred out of existence

R: I knew it!

COLBY: I also love crying “racism” for no good reason other than to exploit for political advantage

COLBY: I believe that the priorities of the current Presidential Administration should involve abolishing the police and discouraging motorists by driving gas up to 15 bucks a gallon

R: Tucker warned me about people like you

COLBY: AOC is calling the shots, you know

COLBY: Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going on an apology tour

R: Why?

COLBY: Eh, no reason. I just enjoy groveling before our enemies while self-righteously scolding other Americans for being insufficiently woke

R: Whatever, dude

COLBY: DID YOU MISGENDER ME?

R: Nice touch