Thread by @subomiplumptre

𝗗𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗙𝗲𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗲 𝗖𝗘𝗢,

I am not married, and I do not have children. I provide this caveat because by the time you finish reading this, you may think, "She doesn't understand."

#DearCEO

However, wisdom is not circumstantial. You must take what makes sense to you and then, leave the rest. So here's my story.

I am the child of a high achieving woman. In her lifetime, my mother ran four businesses at different points while raising six children.

This came at a huge personal cost. And so, this post is for female CEOs, executives and entrepreneurs. I would like to share the lessons from my mom.

𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗪𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗔𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗕𝗲 𝗕𝘂𝘀𝘆

As an executive, you will be stretched by life. Your nature is to step in when there's a need and to help. So, accept your fate and focus on managing your busy life well.

Nature abhors a vacuum. Your time will be filled by activity regardless of whether you're in a relationship or not. That's why the unmarried end up in key operational roles in churches. The time they would have spent on children is given to God.

It's why if your income moves from $5,000 to $10,000, you will inevitably spend it all by month-end. Your tastes will change based on what you can now afford. The number of people who want to spend the money with you will also increase.

So, make strategic choices as a female executive based on your availability. Be bold enough to design your life and to not feel the need to explain yourself to others.

Here's what my mother did. While her kids were young, she set up small shops. As they grew older, she ran a hospital, built a house and became an itinerant evangelist. Dear CEO, you can become many things in a single lifetime. So, embrace seasonal customizations and roles.

𝗗𝗼 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝗿𝘆 𝗦𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗠𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘆 (𝗼𝗿 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗶𝘀𝗻'𝘁 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗦𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀)

As an executive, it is no longer in your DNA to look at prices at restaurants or to fly coach.

Your spirit will reject it, if you have to go on vacation with someone who can't afford a great hotel. And if you are famous, you will need security so there are some places you will not be comfortable in.

Whether it's your money that will be spent or your significant other's or both, just be with someone who can afford it or accept it.

The idea is to use money to reduce friction. You cannot be hardworking at work and then also be stressed at home.

You deserve ease and do not have the extra bandwidth for domestic problems. So, if someone has an issue with toothpaste being pressed in the middle, buy two.

If you like symmetry & order, purchase a big enough house for two home offices - yours and theirs. Use money to secure peace, where possible.

𝗢𝘂𝘁𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗰𝗲 𝗘𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗘𝘅𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁 𝗥𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽𝘀

A president has one of the most demanding jobs in the world, and that's why they don't do laundry. They show up for work and leave everything that's non-essential.

As an executive, do not accept a role that can't pay you enough to outsource your domestic needs, which includes hiring a high functioning assistant. Free up your time and then do dinners with your kids and loved ones.

Take spontaneous vacations with friends by private jet and skip the airport queue. Create qualitative pockets of time for love and relationships.

By the way, stop feeling guilty about outsourcing manual labour (unless you enjoy it, of course.) Look at it in terms of your per-hour value. You earn more from an hour at work than from spending time vacuuming. It costs less to pay someone to do it instead.

The only thing you must never outsource is relationships. Prioritize them at all costs.

𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗢𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗘𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗰𝘆 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗰𝘁

Learn to switch off your phone, so your mind can rest. Designate someone as your emergency business contact, which could be your COO or Co-founder.

If you're unavailable, life will still go on. Invest in a competent team and trust them with responsibility.
My family knows to call 911 in an emergency, and not me at certain times of the day, because I will be unreachable.

That time is spent on relationships - with myself and with God - until such a time as I have a husband to share it with. The world will not collapse if you're not around. You are not indispensable.

𝗞𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗟𝗶𝗺𝗶𝘁𝘀

Don't take on more than you can chew. I'm 45 now and have no desire to have children any more. In this season of my life, I only have so much emotional capacity left.

I'm also on a sabbatical from volunteering with NGOs. Once this season passes, I may have more room to serve.

As a female executive, stop saying yes to everything. You are not Superwoman. You will break.

𝗜𝗻𝘀𝗶𝘀𝘁 𝗼𝗻 𝗘𝘅𝗰𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘀

Don't let your staff kill you. Insist they do their work well, so they take the burden off you. Stop accepting mediocrity or shoddy output. Give your team room to fail (with risk mitigation back ups in place).

A large cause of your headache, is having to redo what someone else should have done well in the first place. Don't accept this as a pattern.

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗸 𝗛𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗢𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝘀

Whether it's by retaining consultants or a business coach, you should never be the smartest person you know. You will limit your growth otherwise. Deliberately hire people who challenge you and call out your BS.

𝗖𝗮𝗽𝗶𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘇𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗨𝘀𝗲 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗳𝗶𝘁𝘀 𝗪𝗶𝘀𝗲𝗹𝘆

Create new cash flow spinoffs early or capitalize enough so you can grow your existing business and introduce efficiencies.

One of the greatest burdens of an executive is trying to run a business with shrinking working capital. Give up some equity for funding so you can attract exceptional talent.

𝗜𝗻 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗰𝗹𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻

Don't forget to appreciate yourself. You are fabulous and have succeeded where many have failed. Celebrate the uncommon person that you are.

And remember, just because you're achieving doesn't mean you shouldn't be kind. Keep your heart soft at all times.

I wish you the best.

PS: I write interesting thoughts but my day job is helping middle class Africans and Diasporans create wealth. Learn about my investment cooperative here: vizientcoop.com