Thread by @StupidRock

#pregnancyhelpline #thingsIhear
A young woman called me, she was very early in pregnancy. She was trying to decide whether to have an abortion or carry to term. She was facing pressure from her family for one option, and from her bf for another option. She just did not know
1/

what to do and had never found herself in this situation before, so she hadn't really thought about her options. It was later at night, so I had more time to talk with her. We went over carrying to term and adoption, since one thing she was afraid of was providing for the
2/

baby and having them grow up in a good environment, She mentioned she knew she could not carry to term only to give her child up. If she carried to term, she would have to parent.
(Many women I talk to feel this way, btw. Adoption is not an option bc they do not want to be a
3/

parent, but they feel if they carry to term they will be too attached to their child to place them for adoption. So to avoid parenthood and/or the expectation of pain of giving their child away, they will opt for abortion in early pregnancy.)
So then we talked about the
4/

possibilities of being a parent (though I see parenthood starting at fertilization, trying to convince some women they are already a parent so early in pregnancy will push them away or make them clam up or get defensive. I have to choose when to go this route or not), and she
5/

shared her concerns. We discussed abortion: the procedures, her concerns during and after for health, and her mental and emotional state after. My job is to usually refer a woman to a pregnancy help center if at all possible. However, since this was after-hours, none were open
6/

and this lady needed someone to talk to now. She wanted to be a mom-she just wasn't sure now was the right time. We spent maybe 15 minutes or so just talking, with me trying to get her to see some perspectives maybe she hadn't thought of before, asking her questions, and
7/

encouraging her.
She did ask me for my personal view on abortion, so I did get to share that. It's not something I do unless a client asks.
Before she got off the phone, still undecided but a little more at peace knowing she had talked through the possibilities with someone
8/

and had some concrete things to consider, she told me she had tried calling another hotline a couple days ago.
What she got was someone quoting Bible verses at her and telling her about condoms as if she were 13 yrs old, she said. So she just wanted to thank me for being
9/

patient and listening to her.
I hate to admit it, but her experience rings true. While I am a prolife Christian, I understand women who hear things like she did may feel judged and turned off from the help we can offer. So I am very glad she risked calling another helpline.
10/10

@threadreaderapp unroll