Thread by @InvisibleCNBC

1/6 Grief journeys

Somedays it is beautiful, days full of exploration, of curiosity. The sun is out and it warms my battered heart, offering hope of healing, of a life that will be just as alive as if we had kids.

#childlessnotbychoice #planb #healing #childlesscommunity

2/6 On other-days I plunge into an internal void, where my childless sadness grapple-hooks past tortures. Even so the sun is out, it just burns my skin, as I forget to care for myself. For I repeat past stories that scream I am not worth it.

#childless #invisiblegrief #grief

3/6 More often than not, somedays and other-days are the same-day. As I reflect on my yesterdays I find myself wanting to tell myself new stories. Stories based in now, not conjured from the tricks of the past. In this moment I matter,

#childlessnotbychoice #loss #journey

4/6 I am loved & an alive life is more than possible, it is now.

The telling of this story of mattering is a step I will have to repeat daily, just like I did with my old stories of deception. It is a story of honouring, it is a story worth staying with, crafting & living in.

5/6 It is a story awaiting a map, a map I'll create everyday, a map I'll no doubt lose somedays, but also a map I'll find again after my other-days. For it is a map I'll hold close to my healing heart.

#childlessnotbychoice #childlesscommunity #expression #creativity

6/6 The photo that inspired the writing. A day of beauty, but also difficult emotions & thoughts as I create & map my new stories.

#childlessnotbychoice #childless #childlessness #invisiblegrief #grief #infertility #childlesscommunity #amwriting #healing #planb #Iamworthy