Ok my Biches, a #thread on the next best shit you can do during this mother fucking #Pandemic to stay safe. Why do you need this? Because Karen is fucking over it, Bitch needs a pedi and an ethnic inclusion taco.
Let’s break this shit down by areas you may go, for example: That shit hole of a Dollar General that never fucking closed, a restaurant you can’t afford but are fucking going anyways.
That inner sanctum you use for making the beast with two backs aka; your couch or kitchen table. Beds are for safer times lol.
The Store- We are all basically at the point where the ethnic isle in your grocery store is like a shitty insta travel account that we have to stare at and talk about.
At this point, you need to be asking yourself as you stand in that isle, are you fucking killing it as a Hunter Gather or are you farming in a pre-industrial culture and living till your old as shit at the age of 35?
The correct answer is you need to be a fucking Hunter Gatherer and get that shit with speed. Find your crap and GTFO!
You want to reduce your potential viral load (exposure rate) as much as you can. One of the most effective ways to do this is by reducing the time you are in an area.
The fucking pasta isle is not a museum. Got it? Bitch you better, this is your life in your own hands.
The Restaurant- Can we just take a moment and say how we ACTUALLY miss a shitty waiter because it was a shared moment of pointless rage? Vs the current 3+ years of actual needed rage.
That fucking restaurant, wear your damn mask when you enter/ leave and in the bathroom. If they only have inside seating, GTFO. Only sit outside and at a social distance from the table next to you.
🎤 Let’s talk about 🍆 baby, lets talk about you and me. All the good things and the bad things that may be.🎤 Now that that song ind in your head #YoureWelcome.
Sex- NY wants you to make a glory hole or a body condom or only the butt stuff from behind or 🤷♀️. Practically speaking of you want to collect someone’s else’s cash and prizes you both have to lock down.
That would start with each of you having a negative test and then 14days of ppl avoidance. Once you two are in the clear, bubble up and fuck that shit out!
Keep your bubble tight and have frequent open conservations about risk factors you have encountered. Ain’t no shame in unintentionally getting sick. But fucking others to fuck others is sick.
Wear a fucking mask and think of others -Dallas
Wear a fucking mask and think of others -Dallas
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
