Autistic people deserve the love & respect that come with acceptance, not merely acknowledgment that autism exists. Awareness is passive. Acceptance is a choice.
Here are ten ways you can honor autistic people of all ages. (Hark, a thread!)
#Neurodiversity #autism #autistic
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Here are ten ways you can honor autistic people of all ages. (Hark, a thread!)
#Neurodiversity #autism #autistic
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1) Honor communication. Everyone communicates. If your autistic loved one struggles with spoken language, help them find a communication system that works for them, whether scripted speech, typing, a symbol-to-speech device or app, sign language, or a letter board.
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Understand that an autistic person’s spoken words may not accurately represent what they’re thinking, or their intentions. My son sings “The cold never bothered me anyway!” to tell me he’s cold. If he asks me to repeat phrases after him, he's asking for reassurance. 3/
Autistic communication isn't necessarily verbal or language-based; sometimes communication happens through behavior, like a child refusing to get out of bed, or being upset with routines that usually comfort them. 4/
It's important to pay attention to this kind of non-spoken communication; while it may be a show of independence, behavioral changes can also be an autistic person's only external sign of illness (see thinkingautismguide.com/2016/08/when-a… for more info on that). 5/
Also honor autistic ability to participate in communication. Many non-speaking autistic folk take a few moments to process spoken words, but also understand most everything people say. Don’t use a sing-song voice, or speak extra slowly. Use your regular voice, please. 6/
2) Honor competence. Recognize the things your autistic loved can do, and encourage them to do them. Have patience if the learning takes a bit longer than you might expect—
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—as autistic kids' legendary ability to “suddenly” do things like read or ride a bike is often the result of extended practicing, even if, at the time, it seems the practicing wasn't clicking. 8/
So please be patient, and try to avoid doing things for your autistic kids that they are willing and able to do for themselves. Their independence and sense of self-worth need to trump your momentary convenience. 9/
And don't forget to presume competence. This doesn’t mean you should assume every non-speaking autistic child is a hidden genius; it means you should always treat every child like a worthy human being. 10/
3) Honor interests (even if you think they are age-inappropriate). So what if your teen loves watching Caillou, or your 8-year-old only wants to talk about forensic pathology? What is the harm in interests/passions that make your autistic child or loved one (or self) happy? 11/
4) Honor sensory needs. Many autistic people's senses are more finely tuned than a non-autistic person's hearing, smell, or sense of touch. Noises that don't bother you if you aren't autistic may be unbearable to someone who is. 12/
Other people's perfume may feel like chemical warfare. Being in a crowd may feel like drowning. These perceptions are very real, so consider that if you refuse to acknowledge or accommodate autistic sensory needs, you are essentially torturing a fellow human being. 13/
5) Honor executive functioning difficulties. Autistic people often struggle with organization, sequencing, problem solving, & other EF skills. Do everything you can to support your autistic loved ones, such as helping to develop supports like checklists or visual schedules. 14/
Further EF accommodations for autistic people can include eliminating simple barriers in the home, like installing towel hooks instead of towel bars, using open laundry bins instead of ones with lids, or storing dishes in a lower cabinet instead of an upper one. 15/
Small changes in the accessibility of your home, school, or program environment these can make big differences in the happiness and functioning abilities of the autistic people you care about (or, again, your own self).
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6) Honor anxiety. The world is not usually a friendly or accommodating place for autistic people, given some of the topics mentioned here. It’s no wonder anxiety is such a common co-occurring diagnosis for autistic people. It's also one that needs to be taken seriously. 17/
Please do what you can to respect an autistic person's verbal declarations or behavioral indications of anxiety; your consideration can make the difference between an autistic person getting through their day, or having a meltdown. Which brings us to the next topic… 18/
7) Honor routine. Autistic people can find comfort in routine, like using the same series of steps and scripted phrases to get dressed in the morning. As far as many autistic people are concerned, anything different is bad, and a source of stress. Especially surprises. 19/
If things need to change, do what you can to make the transition easier, however works best for that autistic person. Would a "social" story about the transition help? Or would they prefer to ask you to periodically repeat the same scripted details about the upcoming change? 20/
8) Honor autistic role models. There are so many autistic people online being proud and fearless. Learn from them! A very incomplete and haphazard list includes @RutiRegan, @MorenikeGO @M_Kelter, @juststimming, @autistichoya, @JudyEndow, @UnstrangeMind & @epballou. 21/
9) Honor the undiagnosed autistic people you already know. We know that autistic people have always been here, that most of the increase in autism rates has to do with changing diagnostic criteria to include more people, and that women especially often go undiagnosed. 22/
This means that the current CDC autism estimate of 1 in 54 people is probably too low. This means you likely have more autistic people in your life than you officially know you do. 23/
Try to show respect and kindness towards people who, for example, you'd otherwise think are one-upping you when you tell them about your experiences and they reciprocate by telling you about their own related experiences—as reciprocation is a very autistic way to empathize. 24/
…and maybe smile and nod and try to honestly listen to the little girl who wants to tell you about every possible gem category and the subtle differences between them. Kindness and courtesy rarely cause harm, after all. 25/
10) Honor autistic people as their own unique selves. Do not disrespect them by trying to view them as flawed, or potential, non-autistic people. Do not be surprised by or resentful of autistic adults who have gained more skills than your autistic child currently possesses. 26/
Do not talk about autistic people having less mature minds in more mature bodies. Do not try to cajole them into doing things that cause them distress, like going to loud parties. Just show some respect by trying not to impose your non-autistic sensibilities onto them. 27/
Because autistic people are, again, individuals. Treat them that way. Accept that some may possess a wicked sense of humor, but totally miss others’ reciprocated (or retaliated) humor or sarcasm. Accept that some function best with noise-canceling headphones at school & work. 28/
Accept that some autistic people loathe hugs & others crave hugs. Accept that some autistic people may enjoy skipping as a form of locomotion whenever possible. Accept that your preferences may surprise them, and their preferences may surprise you.
Accept. Accept. Accept.
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Accept. Accept. Accept.
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