Thread by @ekverstania

I don't know why so many people are laughing at this. Oh yes, wait, I think I may know... It's because they're not autistic, and they don't know how to deal with someone who is trying her level best to make a rational case for something, because logic isn't important to them.

https://twitter.com/PamelaParesky/status/1381846371494416384

It's like Mr Thompson, who led the marching band at my school. I told him I wanted to be in the band. He laughed and said I can't be in the band. I asked why. He said, as though I was asking a ridiculous thing, "Girls can't be in the band." I asked why. HE WOULD NOT TELL ME.

But sure, AUTISTIC people are the ones with the broken brains. 🙄

The desire for logical, reasonable explanations is met with laughter by the Holy Wholesome Norrrmal People. Because logic is a deficit... or something.

Oh, and damn you to hell if you're six years old and hoping for logic, because you ain't getting any. You might as well smash a fish tank or stab the vinyl seats of a car with a fork and get the beating of your life so you'll learn to stop demanding sensible answers from people.

This is what's happening. It's a power ploy.
wikipedia.org/wiki/Appeal_to…

I mean, for her age, this kid is putting up a pretty good argument, right? She's trying to get what she wants in a reasoned, reasonable manner?

And the response is to film her and laugh, and put it on the Internet, and more people laugh at... the adult losing the argument, or...

Are they laughing because the child is trying to be taken seriously, but... they don't think children are human enough to be respected with serious answers, so it's now amusing to them that... this kid hasn't learned about ageism yet, and learned to just shut up?

Oh, and while we're here, I've been wondering about this since the start: Was this posted with the kid's informed consent? Because the 'informed' part means you need to explain what the responses could be if you shared it on social media. And the 'consent' part means permission.

There doesn't seem to have been any consent here:

https://twitter.com/ChronicallyAP/status/1382235104286740483?s=19

Did you know that children can sue parents and others for sharing things without their permission, and that they can do it even when they are no longer children, for something posted, like, 12 years ago?

But of course that would be awkward, and that's how adults maintain leverage. I mean, are you reeeaaally going to sue your own mommmm who looooves you? Awww.

It's not OK to disrespect the children you love.

https://twitter.com/ChronicallyAP/status/1382235104286740483?s=19

And this is why some of us have decided that love is too contaminated and prone to abuse, that we rather want to just fight for respect and justice.

Without respect and justice, love is just pain and confusion anyway.

I very seldom tell people that I love them.

My mother very seldom violated my boundaries when I was young. She read my diary twice, which was very upsetting.

Luckily it was only twice.

I live with my mother now and we get on very well. We like each other immensely.

My mother never laughed at me when I put up a good argument.

Also: Some people are not good at logical arguments and that's no crime. It's perfectly possible to be sensible without being able to explain your reasoning. A lot of anxious people and people with intellectual disabilities, for example, can't explain their reasoning.

It doesn't make them WRONG.

Sometimes we actually CAN explain our reasoning if people allow us the time. We should be able to ask for that time.

If your kid asks you a heck of a good question ("My friends went, why can't I go?") and your gut tells you that no matter how much she argues, your reason for denying her request is valid, then...

...tell her that although you're denying the request now without a good explanation, you promise to put some thought into how best to explain the thinking that led you to this decision, because you're not so good at doing that instantly.

I once had to explain to an autistic friend why a question he asked at a dinner party was inappropriate, and I was unable to do that immediately. I was twice his age, and it was so quick and intuitive to me that what he did wasn't OK, that it took some time to unravel the reason.

And don't forget that sometimes you will discover through contemplation, that your reason was actually not a good and valid one, and then you need to apologise TO THIS PERSON OVER WHOM YOU HOLD POWER.

Be prepared from the start to apologise if necessary.