Thread by @tomaspueyo

As vaccination ⬆️, we will go out again and see ppl we haven't seen in a long time

Those conversations can be awkward. And many ppl hate small talk. How can we avoid that? With questions that get you close fast. Here are a few, backed by science & adapted to a post-COVID world🧵

Light starters:
1. Given the choice of anyone in the pandemic world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you have wanted to become famous during the pandemic? How?

3. What was a “perfect” lockdown day for you?

4. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

5. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

6. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

7. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

Next level of closeness:
8. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?

9. What dreams did you have before COVID that you never got around to doing? Are you gonna do them now?

10. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

11. What did you learn about friendship and love during COVID?

12. What is your most treasured COVID memory?

13. What is your most terrible COVID memory?

14. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

15. How did your family cope with COVID? What would you have changed?

Intense closeness:
16. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling…”

17. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”

18. Tell your partner 5 things you like about them; be very honest, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met

19. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life

20. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

21. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

22. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

23. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

24. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how they might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

This is from a subset of Qs from Dr. Arthur Aron's research on how to accelerate closeness

nytimes.com/2015/01/09/sty…