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Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
@hmm_cook
Aug 13, 2022 • 7 tweets • 2 min read • Read on X
Let's make a list:
How can NTs be a better friend to autistics?

My students asked me this yesterday, and we had a great discussion. I'd love to gather more ideas.

#askingautistics #ActuallyAutistic
One of our suggestions: use more tone tags. And in person, tell me when you are being sarcastic/joking if it looks like I don't get it.
Also, understand that I may say the wrong thing, but I'm usually not trying to be rude, so if something comes out wrong, please remember I'm not trying to be offensive.
I'm thinking of putting together a list to share. Please retweet to gather lots of ideas.
Based on the response to this thread, I will definitely be curating a list soon!
Also, let me know in advance if other people are invited too, so I can wrap my head around who I will be socializing with, or make a choice not to come. If plans change (esp. more people are coming), let me know as soon as possible.
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More from @hmm_cook

Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
May 6
🧵 Are you hiding your natural Autistic reactions from people? Maybe you've done that so much, for so long, that you don't even notice anymore. Here are the top 20 signs that you might be masking your autism.

#ActuallyAutistic #AutisticTwitter #ADHDTwitter #AuDHD #Neurodiversity
So, where do these top 20 signs come from? In November and December of 2022, mostly, I tweeted over 60 examples of everyday situations that might be signs that you’re masking your autism.
These tweets were a hit for a while, and thousands of people commented, liked, and engaged with them, and I’ve been wanting to make a roundup of the top 20 ever since. Which is this!
Read 36 tweets
Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
Mar 15, 2023
🧵Common warning signs of autistic burnout:

Either that it's coming soon, or that you’re in it.

People in burnout may experience some of these, but probably never all of them.

#AutisticBurnout #ActuallyAutistic #Neurodiversity #AutisticTwitter #AuDHD
1/26
Also, all comparisons (more, increased, longer, etc) are using YOUR personal best functional time in life as a baseline. This is not a comparison to others, this is a comparison to you alone.

In no particular order:
2/26
Low energy.

Exhaustion.

Sleep disruptions, lack of sleep, or sleeping all the time without feeling rested.
3/26
Read 24 tweets
Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
Mar 7, 2023
If you're working on:

#burnoutrecovery
#AutisticMasking
#sensory quality of life improvements
figuring out your wants and needs

trying to get better at noticing and responding to what's going on in your own body is an essential part of making progress.

#AutisticBurnout
1/7
If don't know what's going on inside come on you can't tell when you are pushing too hard, or what things are affecting you, or how, whether your being your masked or unmasked self, etc.
2/7
People ask me all the time how to get better at this stuff and it's actually pretty simple. Thought it does take time and attention.

Noticing what's going on in one single body part in this particular moment, creates associations between that sensation and its meaning.
3/7
Read 7 tweets
Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
Feb 22, 2023
🧵How to get out of #AutisticBurnout when you can't quit responsibilities (parenting/work/etc).

This is meant as a framework, a guide. Please adjust for your own circumstances and needs.

#ActuallyAutistic #Neurodiversity #AutisticTwitter #AuDHD
Before we get practical:

Recognize that things are going to have to change eventually. You may not be able to quit your kids or your family or even this job, but something is going to have to change.

You can't heal in the environment that made you sick.
1. You can make a lot of gains for free, with little or no extra time, by picking apart and dissolving the untrue thoughts that are causing you pain.

You can do this even when the kids and loud and you're cleaning up peach juice flung against the wall, or your boss is raging.
Read 23 tweets
Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
Feb 21, 2023
Notice even tiny moments when there's no panic attack, and stress is a tiny bit lower. Simply remind yourself in the slightly better moments that it is slightly better.

#MentalHealth #AutisticBurnout #Depression
1/4
As opposed to just waiting for it to be bad again, or discounting that it is slightly better because it's worse a lot of the time.
2/4
Whatever we focus our attention on, our attention will focus on that more. So, if you're focusing just on how bad it is, you'll be reinforcing how bad it is. But if you focus on the fact that this moment is slightly better, there's a feeling of 'it can get slightly better.'
3/4
Read 4 tweets
Heather Cook 🦓🖖Autistic Life Coach Profile picture
Dec 18, 2022
🧵about autism "treatment"

When I got my #autism dx (at 35) and started trying to figure this stuff out, I scoured the Internet, researched standard “treatment” options, and searched high and low for anything that would help.

#ActuallyAutistic #AutisticTwitter #AutismAcceptance
I was quickly frustrated that most autism services were only available to kids, but later learned that most of those were crap anyway. So, blessing in disguise.
That forced me to look for unorthodox solutions. To find my own way. And confront a lot of my assumptions, internalized ableism, and prejudice against using my emotions or body signals as any sort of useful information.
Read 8 tweets

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