How to make noodles on Social Media (only applicable for males) :

1. Create an account

2. Use an attractive DP. If you're not attractive (applies to majority of people) download someone else's pic & use.

3. Post pics of yourself or your 'original self' regularly.

...1/n 4. Start replying to girls on TL.

5. Get yourself added in various GCs where girls are there too.

6. Try to boast about your wealth in GCs. If you're not wealthy (most aren't) download pics from net.

7. Take the conversation from GC to DM.

8. Do RR in DM of girls.

...2/n

This is the Nationwide Distributor List for #Remdesivir

Sharing this so it can help those who need it 🙏🏼

List is sorted by State Names

Please Save & Share as much as you can 🙏🏼

State : Maharashtra State : Maharashtra, Gujarat, Delhi

This is the Nationwide Distributor List for #Remdisivier

Sharing this so it can help those who need it 🙏🏼

List is sorted by distributor name in alphabetical order.

I've been seeing various things being in short supply & thought of a simple & efficient way to tackle these shortages. I hope the powers to be take note of it. Please do read it fully and also suggest any changes as you deem fit as possible. 🙏🏼

#thread on #covindSecondWave

1/n 1. Hospital Beds : Create a central public portal having detailed inventory of all the beds of all Covid designated Hospitals across India having details like expected per day room charges, contact details, directions (redirect to Google maps). All data should be real time.

2/n

#thread

Just penning some thoughts on #FarmersProtest

1. The protests are obviously politically sponsored. The farmers won't be negatively affected by new farm laws. The Govt has only added an additional selling channel for the farmers, which is completely voluntary.

1/9 2. The MSP selling route is still open. The mandis, aadtis etc are still going to function as they were doing. It's just that the farmers have a choice now. Also there are dispute redressal mechanisms which will solve any disputes in a time bound manner. Another win.

2/9

Today was the day #MumbaiTerrorAttack had happened. It was the final culmination of a few years of planning done by people in both the cοuntries. This had started after 2004 when a party came to pοwer. Their agenda was to tαrnish the reputation & image of a religiοn and to bring it on par with a peaceful religiοn. Hence the investigations in Samjhauta Express & Mecca Masjid incidents were overturned and were done with a fresh angle. #MumbaiAttacks were the final showpiece of this strategy. Proper planning had been done. People were trained, back stories

A lot of you must have been wondering why the 'Lυtyens' ecosystem hαtes Arnab Gοswami & #RepublicTV so much ? What have they done to warrant such hαte ? In this #Thread I will try to answer this from top level info gathered from my sources in the ecοsystem. Let's begin 👍🏼 Lυtyens Ecοsystem is like a Hydrα. It has many heαds but the most visible ones are 2 : Mediα & Pοlitics. Both help in giving visibility & credibility to the third face - fαke αctivism. Since 2014 there's been a complete οnslaught on these 2 visible faces of the ecοsystem.

Haters will say this WhatsApp Chat is as fake as TRPs of #IndiaTodayTRPchor Continued...Read till the end 😆

A #thread on the Hypοcrisy of #rahulkanwal and India Today.

He's questioning how the recordings of journalist (who was tutοring victim's family) were leaked. Let's see the incidents when he and his channel 'leaked' recordings and other sensitive info.

Let's begin 👍🏼 When India Today 'scoops' audio tapes of Dawοοd Ιbrahim, it's all well and good. They can even get CCTV footage. Then nobody asks how India Today obtained them ? Did Dawοοd himself give them or was his phone being tapped by India Today ?

My sources in Media Industry (very highly placed can't name them, sorry 🙏🏼) told me the real reason behind the sudden Media Attention & Hyperbole towards #Hathras incident. The reason is none other than TRP

Week after week Republic & Republic Bharat has left them behind in TRPs These channels tried everything to counter Arnab, some even resorted to copying the style of Republic when reporting from Mumbai about #NCB investigations. Some copied chasing of cars like Republic does. When even that couldn't dislodge Republic...

How Many Priyanka Chaturvedis Are There In Congress ? 😭😭😂😂🤣🤣

https://twitter.com/INCIndia/status/1091267874138644480?s=19

Adarniya @narendramodi ji, #HappyBirthdayPMModi #HappyBdayNaMo Aapko janmdin ki hardik shubhkamnaye 🙏🏼

Aapka Bharat ka Pradhan Sevak banna hi humara sabse bada tohfa hai aur main aapko...

.@narendramodi जी के जन्मदिन पर उनके लिए लिखे हुए चंद शब्द : #HappyBirthdayPMModi

प्रगति पथ पर बढ़ता ही रहे
ऐसा नया भारत हमें बनाना है
मैं देश को ना रुकने दूंगा
हर पल आगे ले जाना है

माँ भारती का मैं बेटा हूँ
माँ ने ही मुझे बुलाया है
मुझको सौंपे हैं काम सभी
मुझे चौकीदार बनाया है कितनी भी मुश्किल आएं
हर मुश्किल से टकराना है
मैं देश को ना रुकने दूंगा
हर पल आगे ले जाना है

सारा भारत है परिवार मेरा
हर व्यक्ति को अपना माना है
सबके दुख दर्द मैं दूर करूँ
अपने मन में ये ठाना है
है यही इरादा अटल मेरा
संकल्प से सिद्धी पाना है

On #TeachersDay I 🙏🏼 to the Gurus who've taught me :

Satire - @theskindoctor13
Creativity - @Atheist_Krishna
Sarcasm - @rahulroushan
Befitting Replies - @pokershash
Helpfulness - @coolfunnytshirt
Selflessness - @kannadaveera
Ecosystem - @TheSquind
Humbleness - @ExSecular
... Guiding Others - @TheAngryLord
Fact Checking - @iAnkurSingh
Team Player - @NindaTurtles & @__memenist
Making +ve Impact Through Twitter - @seriousfunnyguy
Exposing LW - @desimojito
To Always Stand For The Truth - @UnSubtleDesi
Trolling - @KyaUkhaadLega
Fearlessness - @Ra_Bies

एक बार एक आदमी खाना खाने बाहर रेस्टोरेंट में गया | वेटर ने उसको बैठाया, पानी पिलाया और मैन्यू कार्ड दिया | आदमी ने 1 दाल और 1 सब्ज़ी का ऑर्डर दिया | वेटर ने पूछा कि ब्रेड में क्या लेंगे ? रोटी या नान? उस व्यक्ति ने वेटर से कहा कि चूँकि नान मैदे से बनी होती है इसलिए ज़्यादा नान खाने से हाजमा बिगड़ सकता है | दूसरी बात ये कि नान को तंदूर में पकाते हैं और वो कभी भी रोटी की तरह लौ में से तप कर नहीं गुज़रती जिससे कुछ समय बाद नान में अकड़ जाती है और वो पापड़ बन जाती है | अगर नान कच्ची रह जाए तो रबड़ बन जाती है जिसको जैसा भी चाहो मोड़ सकते हो और उस व्यक्ति

A #Thread on the Monsoon Rains :

Every monsoon season we see our cities being flooded with rain water. Every year during the monsoons it's the same old story. Why is it that our cities face flooding in the monsoons & water shortage during the peak summer months? The answer... lies in the legacy drainage systems. Most of our drainage systems have been laid by the British. Some of them have been re-laid by us after Independence but as with everything here, we didn't take the future growth of these cities into account and hence they are capacity...

So trying to write a Kalpanik #Thread on World Politics, Hope you like it. Please don't ask for proofs, I can neither confirm nor deny it 😪

So there are 3 characters :
1. Mr. Trumpet
2. Mr. She
3. Mr. Putout

Now Mr. She & Mr. Trumpet have been against each other since... Mr. Trumpet won the election. Since Mr. She's country is also rising against Mr. Trumpet's country, there were bound to be tensions between them. Mr. Putoff is supporting Mr. She as his country is a traditional rival of Mr. Trumpet's country. What makes this interesting is that..