I had a dream.
Our PM, summoning leadership from somewhere, addressed the nation.
The referendum, she said, was compromised by criminal activity and foreign interference. She produced evidence.
It did not represent the will of the people.
1/
Our PM, summoning leadership from somewhere, addressed the nation.
The referendum, she said, was compromised by criminal activity and foreign interference. She produced evidence.
It did not represent the will of the people.
1/
For this reason, she had written to President Tusk to withdraw the UK’s Article 50 notification. The EU, subject to the agreement of the EUCO, had accepted.
And she apologised to our European partners for any inconvenience caused by this momentary lapse of national reason.
2/
And she apologised to our European partners for any inconvenience caused by this momentary lapse of national reason.
2/
A judge-led inquiry into the entire Brexit debacle would be instigated at the earliest opportunity, with statutory powers to compel witnesses to appear.
Those found guilty of criminal conspiracy against the vital national interest would be prosecuted.
3/
Those found guilty of criminal conspiracy against the vital national interest would be prosecuted.
3/
Henceforth, the UK would resume its place among the leading European nations, aiming to forge a Europe serving its people, bring peace and prosperity to all.
United in diversity.
4/
United in diversity.
4/
From now on, we would engage constructively and bring our unique, and formerly respected, viewpoint to bear on much-needed reforms.
5/
5/
The national curriculum would be expanded as soon as practicable to include education on the basics of the functioning and institutions of the EU.
The next generation would thus be immune to stories of bendy bananas.
6/
The next generation would thus be immune to stories of bendy bananas.
6/
As she spoke, the pound saw its largest-ever leap in value on the currency markets, heralding lower prices on goods from food to fuel.
Within the week, companies had announced, where feasible, the reversal of their plans to move activities to the EU.
7/
Within the week, companies had announced, where feasible, the reversal of their plans to move activities to the EU.
7/
The Bank of England revised upwards its growth forecasts for the UK economy, and announced a pause in its interest-rate hikes.
Inward investment to the UK began to grow again.
8/
Inward investment to the UK began to grow again.
8/
European Parliament elections saw their highest-ever turnout in the UK, with MEPs from all major parties being returned.
UKIP were wiped out, with not a single MEP elected.
9/
UKIP were wiped out, with not a single MEP elected.
9/
And then I woke up.
But all it would take is a little courage from @theresa_may.
And one little letter.
/ENDS
But all it would take is a little courage from @theresa_may.
And one little letter.
/ENDS
