Thread by @lizziefortin

Without #ClearTheAir tonight, I'm going to share something that #ClearTheAir helped me do.

In the spring when we read #DareToLead @ValeriaBrownEdu pushed us to find home groups and engage in a different way. So I did. I gathered some of my fave humans - @jaimeetaborda @MrsSpragueMath @PamSuperY @YonikaLee @annrokosky

They all knew ME but had varying levels of knowing each other. In this space and time (all through Google Hangout) we shared our fears, our shame, our vulnerabilities. They trusted me A LOT but began to trust each other. It was so beautiful to be a part of.

In the fall (before the spring) @ValeriaBrownEdu had pulled me aside with @knikole and @ChristieNold and maybe someone or some other folks to ask us to create some kind of something to do with folks around race. I don't remember exactly what she asked..but I said yes. (of course)

So fast forward back to DTL. At the end of our time together, I asked if they would be willing to stick together to do some work around race, especially focused on whiteness?
They all said yes.

So this summer we engaged in "Unpacking Whiteness". The group was intentionally all white women. We didn't use one singular text but drew initially from Courageous Conversations, White Fragility, and So You Wanna Talk about Race.

The first time we gathered was in person at my place. We ate and spent time in person together. It was a really wonderful time. (Because as we all know and @ValeriaBrownEdu reminds us... Time spent building community isn't wasted time)

After we ate, we began. I read a lot of things to them straight from Courageous Conversations around the Agreements and creating understanding.
From White Fragility, around the why we need to do this work.
Here's the 1st experience doc. docs.google.com/document/d/1Vs…

We also talked about the Pillars of Whiteness and engaged in the activity around developing our own definition of White Privilege from Black Appetite, White Food.

We then met almost weekly. Each week had a different "focus" but the goal was to think about our own whiteness in relation to this focus. We were also creating our own racial biographies.

Each time we met, we framed the time together with this: “White People: I don’t want you to understand me better; I want you to understand yourselves. Your survival has never depended on your knowledge of white culture. In fact, it’s required your ignorance.” - Ijeoma Olua

And this: “To interrupt white fragility, we need to build our capacity to sustain the discomfort of not knowing, the discomfort of being racially unmoored, the discomfort of racial humility.” Robin DiAngelo

The first week was on whiteness. Here's the resources we engaged with and the questions we used during our conversation. docs.google.com/document/d/1Tt…

The following week was on Blackness. Here's those resources. docs.google.com/document/d/1rq…

The next was on Latinx and Hispanic. Here's those resources. docs.google.com/document/d/1fj…

Our last focused gathering was on Indigenous and Native peoples. Here's those resources. docs.google.com/document/d/1XI…

During these conversations, we talked about our own whiteness, our privilege, our desire to shift things. We talked about our lack of hope and the enormity of it all.

The brilliant Mariame Kaba showed up often in my thoughts: “Hope doesn’t preclude feeling sadness or frustration or anger or any other emotion that makes total sense. Hope is not an emotion and hope is not optimism. I believe there is always a potential for transformation and..

..change…I think this grounded hope can be practiced. Hope is a discipline and we have to practice it every single day. Hope is really believing in spite of the evidence and watching the evidence change.” - Mariame Kaba

In our final meeting, we shared our racial biographies. They had all expressed throughout that this was really hard. They wanted more structure, more answers, more something. I didn't give that to them. What they shared was so beautiful.

@jaimeetaborda talked about her writing and then about the art piece she's thinking about. @PamSuperY showed us the hundreds of pages she's written, asking herself so many questions. @annrokosky created this wonderful timeline with visuals

@YonikaLee shared her writing @MrsSpragueMath talked about her process

We were all learning and drawing from each other while also thinking of ourselves and our experiences in our lives. It was really wonderful to think of ourselves within this collective.

But for me it all was brought home when one of them said that the quote from Ijeoma Olua "I don’t want you to understand me better; I want you to understand yourselves." has sat with them. That all along they thought they only needed to know more about the "other" ..

..when in reality white folks need to know themselves.

This was it.

And then they all agreed to continue learning together! So stay tuned for that!

Thanks for reading through this. Happy to chat with anyone. And so so so grateful for #ClearTheAir and all the support and love in that space.