Thread by @garwboy

Had several replies to this where people are very pleased to have been introduced to the concept of Toxic Positivity

It's not my phrase, it's been around a while, but here's #ToxicPositivity, as I understand it, as a guy who wrote a whole book on happiness in the brain

/1

https://twitter.com/garwboy/status/1276479544497786880

In a nutshell, #ToxicPositivity is when the social pressure put on you to be happy and confident goes beyond any logical limit and becomes unreasonable, unrealistic, and often genuinely harmful.

/2

#ToxicPositivity is likely an inevitable product of the modern obsession with happiness, where we're made to believe that being happy should be our default state, and if we're not happy, then something must be wrong

Scientifically speaking, this is bullshit

/3

[ASIDE: This is explained at length in The Happy Brain, that book I mentioned, the one I wrote]

amazon.co.uk/Happy-Brain-Sc…

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There are many reasons why #ToxicPositivity is harmful. An obvious one is that, under the guise of being helpful and motivational, it emphasises that you, just you, are responsible for your happiness and success. So if you're not happy, that's your fault, and you're a failure

/5

#ToxicPositivity is insidious because, most of the time, those responsible for it genuinely don't mean any harm, and honestly believe they're helping. Calling them out on it means you're the one perceived as ungrateful/stubborn/overly pessimistic etc.

/6

And whether intended or not, a lot of #ToxicPositivity is deeply cynical manipulation

E.g. "The only disability is a bad attitude"

Again, this is bollocks dressed up as inspiration. Encouraging the overcoming of limitations is on thing, but this flat out denies they exist

/7

#ToxicPositivity shifts all responsibility for happiness onto the individual, even when at the mercy of factors way beyond their control. This is really convenient for those responsible for those factors, e.g. employers, governments, controlling partners etc.

/8

Are you depressed because your boss makes you work long hours for no money? Your landlord is evicting you for no reason? You're not white and are enduring systemic racism?

Well, rather than fix any of that, here's a 'Keep Calm And Carry On' mug. So, you're good now, yeah?

/9

That's basically #ToxicPositivity in a nutshell; ignoring all possible external circumstances that are making someone unhappy, and just telling them to 'cheer up' or 'you can choose your outlook', when that's definitively not possible or helpful.

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#ToxicPositivity just adds more crap to the person's already overloaded pile. Because as well as all their own issues, they've got to be polite and tolerant with your input now, because you 'mean well'.

/11

And that's just the surface stuff. If someone's genuinely depressed, they may already be consumed with self-critical negative thoughts. Telling them their mindset is all their fault and can be easily changed (which is balls) can easily make their condition worse

/12

Sure, some may find that they can make themselves happier by sheer force of will. More power to them if so. But #ToxicPositivity assumes *everyone* can do that. And so there's no need to change anything/make anyone's lives easier, because unhappiness is 'all in their head'

/13

So

Positivity is great. Being encouraging and supportive to others is one of our species' best traits

#ToxicPositivity is when that's taken too far, when it denies/ignores reality, often for self-serving reasons, to an extent that can be genuinely harmful

/end