Thread by @gradydoctor

1/
Mentoring Meeting, circa 2002

Her: “So tell me about your interests.”
Me: “Umm. I like teaching. I like patient care. Ummm. . . “
Her: “Have you thought about particular aspects that you like?”

*silence*

Her: “Tell me this. . . Where do you see yourself in, say, 5 years?”

2/
When I look back on my early meetings with mentors, there was so much I didn’t know that I'd tell myself if I could.

Like:

*How do I find a mentor?
*How do I know if we’re a good fit?
*What can I do to make the most of the relationship?
*Can I have more than one?

Sigh.

3/
But you know what? When you know better, you do better. And you also pay it forward.

Let’s talk mentee-ing, shall we?

Me: “Hi, I really enjoyed your lecture. I was wondering if you might be willing to be my mentor?”
Person-who-never-met-me-before: “Say what now?”

4/
Okay. So how DO we find good mentors?

*Through sponsors
*Shared interests
*Shared projects
*Organically while working
*They offer
*Through professional organizations/academic homes

Oh, and we can’t forget one of the most common of all:

*Someone assigns you to them

5/
Your sponsors are #teamyou. They also know your work and leadership style.

If I had time, I’d talk about how it took me 15 yrs to know the difference between my mentors and my sponsors.

Wait, I do.

Sponsors:

1. They know you.
2. They know people

6/
Got interests? Got goals? Think about YOUR needs and how the mentor can help you thrive.

@dan_p_hunt_MD mentors me on all things clinical teaching.
@BusseyJada mentors me on leadership and life.

Which reminds me. . .

I have a whoooole bunch of #DOPE peer mentors, too.

7/
Got projects?

My grandmama always said, “People come to you for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.”

Same with mentors. It’s perfectly okay to have a mentor work with you:

1. Just for a project (a reason)
2. During a particular time (a season.)

And not a lifetime.

8/
Some mentor-mentee relationships are happening organically. But it’s important to define the relationship to get the most from it. This proved HUGE between @BusseyJada and me.

Name it and claim it.

Me: "You guide me a lot. Can we formalize our mentor-mentee relationship?"

9/
And before I forget:

Sometimes your institution will assign you a mentor. These can prove to be meaningful--especially if someone was thoughtful about the connection.

Yup.

Saboteurs are usually:

1. Ill-defined expectations
2. Not building a relationship

Especially 2.

10/
Okay. So let’s talk about what WE can do as mentees:

1/ Have action items to discuss. (Set an agenda)
2/ Establish how y’all will communicate. (Texts ok or nah?)
3/ Meet regularly (even if you text)
4/ Close loops on action items
5/ Be vulnerable
6/ Have good energy.

11/
Example:

Today, I met with @dan_p_hunt_MD. We’ve established that text is okay for small things. I also connect with his admin.

Focus for today:

1/ Bedside presentations and teaching during #COVID19
2/ Follow up on prior projects
3/ Feedback and advice on a project

12/
I have standing meetings with my other mentor @BusseyJada. We work closely in our #DEI leadership roles so we text a lot. But we also meet formally.

This week we discussed:

1/ Updates on my deliverables for shared projects.
2/ Feedback on a talk
3/ Counsel on a big ask

13/
In case someone reading this is wondering what a full professor is doing with all these mentors, they obvi need to read some @Atul_Gawande who reminds us that we ALL benefit from coaching.

Yup.

newyorker.com/magazine/2011/…

14/
Speaking of #DOPE resources that you should read on this topic:

1. @vineet_chopra and @sanjaysaint wrote this awesome piece in @HarvardBiz. It’s one of many must reads from one of the most dynamic duos since Batman and Robin.

Mmm hmm.

hbr.org/2017/11/what-m…

15/
Another favorite that @DxRxEdu turned me onto is this book called “PEAK”. The key to #dopeness isn’t just practice—it’s DELIBERATE practice with feedback.

I love this because it can help you clarify your needs from your mentor through your self expectations.

16/
Okay. Last but not least:
How do you know if the mentor (or peer-mentor) is a good fit for you?

Simple:

You feel psychologically safe.
You meet (read: They have time for & interest in you.)
You hold up your end of the bargain
You value one another's time.

You THRIVE.

17/

Ready to go to the next level?
Wondering why you aren’t getting the most out of your mentor-mentee relationship?

Start by taking control of the part in your control: YOU.

Be intentional.
Be consistent.
Be reliable.
Be open.

Then? Get ready to be awesome. 😊

#medtwitter