The first mindf*ck we wrestle with when sh*t hits the fan is that for men, the answer to better relationships cannot be found by looking at the relationship, or even in looking at the person we’re with
Fact is that all our relationship issues have very little to do with either
Understanding that both women and children are naturally reflective beings, and their behavior is an outgrowth of our own, takes a while to settle in, to really get
Boys of the past 3 generations weren’t told we have that power. Conspiracy or not, this has been a cancer for us
Nature punishes men who look for anything in their relationships. That type of seeking and needing comes from childhood lack, and both women and children are scared by it
Fact is, no one cares what we need. No one owes us anything. Relationships aren’t “for” us (as receivers)
Women and children are fragile and can’t see beyond their own emotions and their own needs
Nature designed a protector for them, and that’s us
So stop talking about your “relationship”, get your body fit and learn to fight
Stop talking about “you’re needs” and make powerful moves with your money
Stop talking about “love languages” with a therapist, and practice mindfulness and mental toughness
Stop “communicating cause that’s the most important thing!” and master personal emotional control
Stop thinking about them so much and what they should or shouldn’t be doing, and go make a positive impact on your community
As you shore yourself up, weird things happen:
You REALLY don’t need to talk as much as you thought you did. I mean really
People become naturally attracted to you (this guy doesn’t “need anything.... I want that”)
All women get revealed for what they are: vulnerable, beautiful, fragile beings that we are uniquely qualified to look after, should we choose take them under our wing
When you see how pervasive their need for safety and validation is, even your mom becomes your daughter
And they all feel more safe the more you’re focused you are on yourself and the unique mission you have with your life
Really, it’s got nothing to do with them
And I have to say, if you’ve been able to get this far in your red pill journey, dodging the pitfalls of bitterness, resignation, and the clutches of the various manosphere grifters, it’s fucking bliss man...
You are you’re own everything. Think of that freedom!
You get fucking jacked every day and lift cities.
You make power moves with money, changing your life and the lives of those around you
You say yes or no based on whatever the fuck YOU want
You see femininity like all the other art that the universe left here for you: It’s beautiful, entertaining, nice to have around, you should take care of it.
When you’ve evolved yourself into a truly self-actualizing man (no corner cutting), with boundaries and some charm, “relationships” aren’t something you ever worry about. They take care of themselves.
So when you look at all of it, what is it?
It’s what you knew it was the whole time. What no mother, female teacher, girlfriend, wife, or weak man could have ever told you...
If you’re not always trying to be the best person you can be, you’re gonna have probbbbblems
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It has boys believing deep down that they're somehow bad people because they're driven by a desire for sex instead of what they're SUPPOSED to want (a long term relationship where they get deeply involved in her all of her emotions)
It needs to be widely understood that this shaming is what actually CREATES metoo men. Natural alphas and those with strong fathers will resist and be unashamed (and reap the rewards), but the majority of boys will listen to her words & believe they have something to hide
They go underground and get covert in their behavior, hide their sexual motives, feign interest in who she is as a person (which ironically leaves no room for them to actually connect with her). If any masculinity is toxic it's the "fake personality covering sexual frustration"
can be a more useful question than “what do you want from me?”
This forces them to define what they think they want, and hopefully be confronted with what is and is not a realistic expectation
As men we’re not defined by our gender or our hormones (we obv all contain both feminine and masculine), but we need to make our women aware of the trade offs involved when we occupying our natural pole
However, we also can’t expect her to grasp it (99% of women aren’t aware
of how their attraction actually works). So we have to master reading her emotions
What does she need right now (regardless of what she says she needs)?
Men innately believe that we are able to alter our environment, circumstances, and situation through action
So we are concerned with the root causes of things, and communication is our tool to find out what to DO
Women don't have this underlying belief. Life happens TO them...
... so they are concerned not with root causes, but with effects
Communication is their tool to connect with others ABOUT those effects, to examine them, and exist more fully within them, not necessarily to understand them or find meaning in them
Men seek resolution in communication, the point is to end the interaction.
Women seek an extension of the connection they get from communication, ending it is the worst thing you can do
"Maximize DHV, minimize DLV" is the "buy low, sell high" of relationships for men
DHV (demonstrations of high value): Not reacting emotionally when she does, being strong, being attractive, being decisive, fixing things, doing what you say you're going to do...
... attracting interest from other women, succeeding professionally, being in charge of your own time (not rushing), winning with money, picking your battles, winning contests of skill, being ambitious and motivated, being kind to the weak, not sweating the small stuff
DLV (demonstrations of low value): Being too emotional, physically weak, not being useful, not taking action and forcing her to instead, generating no interest from other women, not having $, being easily distracted, not being able to ignore meaningless demands on ur attention...
For a man, “couples therapy" is NOT an effective strategy to heal or fix a relationship.
Short thread here for men who have to go, or might have to go at some point in the future
The couples therrapy format (verbal communication) lends itself entirely to the female imperative of putting her emotional experience before everything else
Deep down, you ALREADY know this
This is another example of our gynocentric culture convincing you that something you know in your bones is “toxic” or something you need to “evolve beyond”.
No. You’re not a woman. You’re a man. You’re different, and that’s a wonderful thing.