Fighter: I'm boooored.

Barbarian: Want to fight a dragon?

F: No.

B: Train?

F: Naw.

B: Anything you want to do?

F: I don't want to do anything. I'm just... blech.

B: Let's go bully some goblins. You love bullying goblins.

F: I do not!

B: I think the goblins disagree.
#DnD
B: Alright friend, let's go do something.

F: I really don't want to.

B: I know and that's why we must.

F: What would you know about this? You're always angry or whatever.

B: I am not but I could be now.

F: Sorry.

B: Don't be. The monster you face now is powerful indeed.
F: What? I'm not fighting, I'm just sad.

B: I know sad, this is not simply sad. You think I am only rage but that is not true. To derive power like mine from an emotion, one must understand their own on an intimate level. I am not just rage. I am sad, I am happy, I am compassion
F: So you're going to tell me how to fix this?

B: No. There is no fixing, there is only accepting and growing. I believe you are depressed.

F: Yeah, like I said. Sad.

B: No, not sad. Well, maybe also sad. These are linked but not the same. One is fleeting, the other you fight.
F: I don't want to. I'm just fine here.

B: Are you?

F: Yes.

B: Truly?

F: I will be.

B: Of that I am certain. Now, get up. We are going for a walk.

F: I don't need you to fix me.

B: And I'm not attempting to.

F: I don't want to talk about it.

B: Then don't. Just walk.
F: What are you trying to do then?

B: Care for a friend.

F: I'm fine.

B: So you say. Let me ask you something. If we went into a fight, dragon or demon, would you let me go on an empty stomach?

F: Obviously not.

B: Would you let me go with an injury? If I was suffocating?
F: No. What does th-

B: And I would not let you do the same. This may pass, it may not. But you cannot fight on an empty stomach, you cannot fight without air. So we are going to walk, we are going to eat, we are going to breathe. We can speak or not, that is your choice in this
F: A quick fix.

B: Not by any stretch. This is a single step. Like I said before, there is no "fix" and there is no edge. All we're doing is removing the disadvantages in this fight. You've already overthought it as it is. Now, up. You can walk on your feet or we can share mine.
F: What, are you going to hoist me over your shoulder?

B: I might. Don't tempt me.

F: Alright, alright. I'm getting up. You're a jerk, you know that?

B: Of that there is no doubt. But this jerk knows a great river walk that ends right near an ice cream shop.
Depression is a powerful foe, one that cannot be fought the same way by every person. I agree with the Barbarian's take, to a point. Sometimes a little push can be helpful, other times it is simply sitting with them. Either way, fresh air, water, and food rarely hurt.
I also wrote this because I am depressed as hell. I'm still getting though but this is probably the single longest bout of depression (without outside pressure) that I've ever been through. They say to write what you know. We will return to our regularly schedule joviality soon.

• • •

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More from @snickelsox

7 Apr
Druid: I need your help.

Necromancer: Oooh? A secret plot?

D: Sure. Take this shovel, I'll explain on the way.

*later*

Cleric: Ok, spill. You've been disappearing for weeks. Has the necromancer corrupted you?

D: No, the opposite!

N: We made an underground greenhouse!
#DnD
Cleric: Let me guess, on a graveyard?

Necromancer: Adjacent.

Druid: The soil is very good there.

C: What!? That's disgusting!

N: Efficient.

C: Sacrilegious!

D: Ecologically beneficial. Here, try these tomatoes.

C: I'm not eating your death tomatoes!

D: Your loss.
D: How do you think the circle of life works? Death and rebirth, or reuse, is a natural part.

N: It turns out I am an important bit of that process!

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10 Mar
Halfling: And this one we age in volcanic rock until it can vote.

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E: Please.
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H: Oh, sorry. As a cheesesmith I can get a little carried away.

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E: Can I try it.

H: You'll literally die.
E: I've tried all of the elven cheeses. I think I'll be fine.

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I once was tricked into arguing with someone on social media who didn't exist to "see if I cared." Don't test people.
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Read 9 tweets
9 Mar
Fighter: I'm... dead?

Cleric: Sorry.

F: Why didn't you save me?

Paladin: We tried, gave it all we had.

F: What now, is this the afterlife?

Bard: Not quite. This is your mind.

F: You're just in my head?

C: We're as real as you need.

F: Why?

P: So you can say goodbye.
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Fighter: Wait, no. I don't want to go. I wasn't ready!

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F: Can't you bring me back?

C: Maybe. But it won't save you from what happens next.

F: What's next?! The inferno? Heaven?

C: You aren't afraid of those. You know what's coming.

F: ...Nothing.
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Fighter: I can stay here for a while?

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F: Are you going to leave?

C: In a sense but not right now. Right now, we're here.
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28 Feb
DM: So wait, your warlock's patron is you?

Player: Yes.

DM: Explain.

P: I'm a being beyond their comprehension, from a dimension foreign to them, and I give powers through ancient texts and random surges of power.

DM: The handbook and dice?

P: Shhh! They might hear you!
#DnD
Cleric: Hey, what's up? You seem distracted.

Warlock: Sorry, my patron was getting in an argument. I might be getting nerfed again.

C: Nerfed? Again?

W: Yeah I only get powers when they argue a pretty trivial point. It's frustrating but I think my patron really enjoys it.
If you like meta, I do meta and more. Follow me for more or hit patreon to find it all.

Patreon.com/snickelsox
Read 4 tweets
27 Feb
Dragon: Amazing! I was looking for an animal companion!

Paladin: No, we're here to slay you.

D: Cute! I was about to start adventuring. I'll call you Major Jingles.

P: No, we're the adventurers! And I'm not an animal companion!

D: You're adorable when you're flustered!
#DnD
D: Do you want a snack?

P: No! I want your blood!

D: Oh no! My poor companion has come down with vampirism! Here, this potion will take care of it.

P: I don't want your stinkin potion!

D: Thats no way to behave! I'm going to have to boop you on the snoot with a scroll.
P: Did... did you just slap me with rolled up paper?

D: Oh, sweetie! I'm so sorry. I just... you have to listen. You don't always understand everything and I have to keep you safe. But I'll try to handle it better next time.

P: You are really serious?

D: Yes! Let's adventure!
Read 4 tweets

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