Thread by @pearsonified

Today is the last day of my 30s.

I'll do some deadlifts later tonight and then post my annual shirtless selfie tomorrow 😘

In August 2005, I took the first steps toward my own entrepreneurial path by teaching myself HTML and CSS.

By September, I created an ecommerce site that funded my next 4 months of learning.

And by January 2006, I was the most sought-after freelancer in the #WordPress space.

It would still be another two years before launching my first piece of software, the Thesis Theme for #WordPress.

In reality, this was a COVER for my next period of intense learning, where I taught myself PHP and JS.

I also began exploring template and typography dynamics.

At age 29, I decided to take Thesis in a new direction, moving from file-based to data-based templates.

This had never been done before. It was a huge project that would consume the next 4 years of my life.

In the meantime, I released Golden Ratio Typography at age 30.

Golden Ratio Typography (GRT) was/is fundamentally tied to my software—it's the foundation upon which ALL design output rests.

Even today, this is probably my single greatest insight.

You can play around with GRT yourself. Check it out! 👇🏿

grtcalculator.com

At 31 years of age, I released my largest project ever...and it was a complete disaster. (At least initially...)

Thesis 2.0 was seen as a red herring by many—promised for years, but it never appeared!

But on October 2, 2012, I revealed it to the world.

The response?

☠️☠️

People weren't ready for Thesis 2.0, and Thesis wasn't ready for them.

I put my head down for another 18 months and *finally* carried out my vision just before my 33rd birthday.

At that time, I discovered I was gonna become a dad 🥳

And I literally retired for 2 years.

I had spent 4 straight years developing a new platform...

Dealing with being cancelled at age 29 (I left that part out, lol)...

And then trying to manage a deluge of negative press that nearly destroyed my business.

I was DONE.

So I played about 350 rounds of golf instead.

I didn't even *think* about work again until just after my 35th birthday.

My precious daughter was 1 year old; I was unhappy with my performance in golf tournaments; and I was in a loveless marriage.

It's no wonder that I struggled to find any momentum or joy.

I'd spend another 2 years managing the decline of my business and failing to produce anything creative.

Just before my 37th birthday, I'd had enough.

I separated from my wife and focused on creating space for myself.

Giving myself room to get in touch with my own vision again.

Slowly but surely, I brought all my systems back online:

• Started recording videos

• Gave the Golden Ratio Typography Calculator its "forever home" in July 2018

• Rebuilt my personal site in September 2018

• Began building the Focus #WordPress Theme in October 2018

During this process, I also had to rebuild my company's website and customer database (@DIYthemes).

Needless to say, my 37th year was one of the most pivotal of my life.

After years as a headless horseman, I "found the reins" and got back on the trail.

By my 38th birthday in 2019, I had changed my health, business, and life:

• I fully committed to a HFLC diet and was back to regular resistance training

• The Focus #WordPress Theme had helped re-establish a positive trajectory for my business

• I felt like the me I love

Unsurprisingly, these internal changes led to positive external changes as well.

I attracted pure love—@OlgaPechnenko—into my life.

I was able to provide a more wholesome family home for my daughter.

Focus graphs? Still going up 📈

I even shot my best round of golf (-2)

Just before my 39th birthday, I learned I was going to become a Daddy for the second time 👶

But this one? A son! 🤩

And I got a new step-son, too ⚽️

On my 30th birthday, I was cash rich.

But 9 years later, I learned what "rich" truly means 🙏🏿

Stories aren't interesting without some drama, though.

In July 2020, I finally began going through divorce proceedings, which I had avoided since 2018.

This led to a cascading series of events that would change everything in my life as my 30s came to an end.

First, I had to sell my beloved home (2508inwood.com) and purchase a newer, cheaper one that could accommodate my family.

This ended up being a 3.5-month ordeal that consumed ALL of my attention and energy.

Second, my ex demanded my daughter go to a public school pod.

Third, my son Maksim was born in December 2020!

He changed my outlook and psychological anchoring more than I had anticipated.

1 kid? Ok, whatever.

2 kids? That's a FAMILY, homey.

The reality hit me like a ton of bricks—I had a woman and *3* kids now!

Meanwhile, the divorce proceedings were going horribly.

The other side's attorneys were bottom-of-the-barrel morons.

We went through 3 rounds of DISCOVERY in what was essentially a basic b*tch divorce.

Complete waste—hell, ROBBERY—of time, energy, and money.

Just awful.

I paid tens of thousands of dollars for pointless hearings where nothing was decided and the judge only got pissed off at the other side for how unprepared and unprofessional they were.

Worse, I was unable to engage in creative work because this nonsense was stealing my energy.

Mercifully, court day arrived one month before my 40th birthday.

But the day itself was anything but merciful.

It was an absolute rout perpetrated by a man-jawed female judge who was essentially Jodie Foster in Contact but with black hair.

Everything would change once again.

And that's where I stand today, here on the eve of my 40th birthday.

Lots of turmoil recently, but it all feels like a cleansing and reorganization necessary to catapult me into the next decade.

Looking back on my 30s, I feel equal parts pride and disappointment...

But here's the thing—

Whatever I feel disappointed about is a product of [1] denying myself and [2] not having a strong enough vision about where I wanted to go.

Those are correctible issues that are 100% on me.

I know this now and anticipate a LEGENDARY decade in my 40s 🤙🏿

Not even sure why I shared this today—I certainly didn't wake up intending to do so.

But here's the thing, fam:

• Graphs don't *always* go up

• Sometimes, things get MESSY behind the scenes

• We fight many fronts simultaneously; it's rare to be winning on all of them

In other words, this is the opposite of "success porn" or "hustle porn."

This is real life, "I got kids 'n shit" stuff that normal people have to deal with...and who generally receive no real sympathy or support.

So what's the point?

Keep going!

Have VISION.

Be CONSISTENT.

But most of all, give yourself space to be the best version of yourself possible.

In my 30s, I stopped giving myself space and let the circumstances of my life crush my energy, desire, and creativity.

I made excuses for why this was ok and maybe even noble.

But I was WRONG.

Remaining in a toxic relationship "for the family" or "for the kids" is WRONG.

Doing so is neither noble nor a net positive for you or your children.

It's another form of spineless procrastination.

And the longer you let it go, the more it costs you.

Finally, my parting shot:

I've cleared off my plate as I head into my 40s.

I am ready to make a remarkable leap into whatever is next for me.

I hope, after reading this today, you are encouraged to get your sh*t together and do the same.

Thank you for reading 🙏🏿