British foxes spoke out today in a desperate call for shit actor and clueless Nazi politician Laurence Fox to stop using their name.
“He’s shitting on us from a height” said a spokesman we are calling ‘Dave’, who agreed to talk to us on condition of anonymity
#laurencefox
“He’s shitting on us from a height” said a spokesman we are calling ‘Dave’, who agreed to talk to us on condition of anonymity
#laurencefox
“It’s not easy being a fox at the best of times” said Dave, “But this scruffy fucker is seriously taking the piss now. We have really cleaned up our act, we haven’t bitten any babies in ages, and we’ve even agreed to a voluntary curfew on the hours during which....”
“....we will wake you by shagging enthusiastically by the bins, but it’s all for nothing when this lanky streak of piss ruins it for everyone”
Dave says it has been an emotional time for him and his fellow vulpines, who feel that years of progress has been wasted.
“Once ....
Dave says it has been an emotional time for him and his fellow vulpines, who feel that years of progress has been wasted.
“Once ....
“....we had people on our side. Even toffs and Royals agreed to let bygones by bygones - we stopped killing their chickens and they stopped chasing the fuck out of us every time we went for a walk - but it’s all for nothing if the papers are full of that daft twat moaning ...”
“....about immigrants and crying because Billie won’t let him see his kids. I’m embarrassed for him, to be honest”
Dave says they have put a solution to Fox, who has yet to reply
“We’ve asked him to change his name to Laurence Bat. Bats are a fucking law unto themselves.....”
Dave says they have put a solution to Fox, who has yet to reply
“We’ve asked him to change his name to Laurence Bat. Bats are a fucking law unto themselves.....”
“.....and they have got their hands full with all this Covid shit. We’ve had a word and they’ve said to ‘bring it on’, which I think is very fair. And frankly they are scary bastards anyway and can look after themselves”
We put Dave’s comments to Mr Fox, who has yet to reply....
We put Dave’s comments to Mr Fox, who has yet to reply....
....although we did receive a call from his agent, who claimed that whatever Mr Fox had said, he was being misquoted, and asked us if we were hiring for I’m a Celebrity.
#laurencefox
#laurencefox
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