Thread by @JewWhoHasItAll

#DearJWHIA,

I have a relative who is Christian (long story). For the last few years, I've bought Chanukkah greeting cards for my family and gone out of my way to get this relative a card that is more appropriate for *her* chag.

1/x

Last year, she complained that I got a card for the wrong holiday, explaining that it was not yet Yom Easter, but Yom Christmas! Who can keep track with the weird solar calendar they follow??

2/x

This year, I made sure to get her a Christmas card. She then pointed out that it had the wrong kind of tree (a maple tree is a tree, so I don't get what the big deal is) and the wrong kind of star!

3/x

The Magen David is what my kids' public school teachers always put on their work when they do well, so shouldn't she just accept this is the right way to draw a star?

4/x

How can I get my relative to see that she is unreasonable in her expectations and is just being ungrateful?

— Christian Ally

#AITA #advice

5/x

Dear Christian Ally,

It is difficult to go so far out of your way for your Christian relative, only to have your efforts thrown back in your face like this.

6/x

Your Christian relative is clearly not grateful for your good-faith efforts. It's probably best to stop attempting to acknowledge her holidays, since she seems to take offense at perceived errors…

7/x

…rather than feeling glad that you took the time to acknowledge the holiday in the first place.

8/x

Sadly, there's no real way for you to explain to your relative that she’s being unreasonable. You can't control other people's feelings and behaviors, but you can draw a boundary for yourself and…

9/x

…decline to make further attempts to acknowledge the holiday since your relative is determined to find fault.

10/x

The easiest solution seems to be to show your love and respect for your relative by sending her greetings when you send them to the rest of the family, at secular holidays like Rosh Hashanah.

#NTA #MedinatAmerica

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