Thread by @jackiewirz

Confessions of a bipolar professor (1/5): #hypomania sounds like it is a wonderful thing - increased energy fueling creativity and good times! What's not to like? But for me, I'm in the midst of dysmorphic hypomania. And it just plain sucks.

#bipolar #highered #AcademicTwitter

(2/5) my brain, which has been rigorously trained for decades, suddenly believes that 1 + 1 = blue. I know I am not thinking rationally, but my head is also telling me to do all sorts of crazy things!

#bipolar #hypomania #AcademicTwitter

(3/5) brain: let's destroy relationships! Let's yell at everybody and go down in the flames of angry glory! Let's run away and purchase a house in Spain! Let's be the worst version of ourself!

Rational brain: wait a second....

#bipolar #hypomania #AcademicTwitter

(4/5) fortunately, I have enough rational brain left to call my psychiatrist. So yesterday I went back on lithium,my old friend, my old enemy. And I'll be honest: it feels like defeat.

#bipolar #hypomania #Academia

(5/5) I've lost to that chemical inbalance in my head. I've failed at being the best prof, mom, and wife again.

But... I also know that I am on the right path. To health and happiness. And while that pill may make me feel stupid and slow, it'll also help make me feel whole.

Bonus tweet: the moral of the story! Being #bipolar is only a weakness if I let it be. I am #strong, and I will rise above this episode of #hypomania. For all of those in #academia , mental health is important: take care of yourself and others!

Love, Jackie

Thank you for all of the responses and DMs! Twitterverse, please retweet this if it will help others!

#WomeninSTEM #MentalHealthMatters #Academia #gradschool #Bipolar #mentalillness #MentalHealthAwareness

From a wise friend....
#highfunctioningbipolar
#exceptwhenimnot

Update: I will be taking a medical leave from work. Hopefully for a short while, all the better to return ready to go!