Thread by @mynamesnotgordy

What I learnt on the Twitter this week:

1. Doug Ford announces billion dollar investment in Ontario's education system by using federal tax dollars to convince parents to like him
2. Stephen Lecce says science insists kids belong in class during a pandemic at home when it's over

3. Supreme Court decides federal carbon pricing is legal. Jason Kenney says now that he's tried nothing he will adopt Rachel Notley's plan.
4. Suez Canal blocked and surprisingly enough it wasn't by Michelle Rempel.
5. Brian Lilley goes deep undercover to get hot political news.

6. Erin O'Toole says CPC will "Restore leadership in Canada." CPC delegates vote against his motion.
7. CPC Jobs Critic Pierre Poilievre continues attack on WE, questioning thousands of jobs the CPC cost students last year.
8. After months of silence Andrew Scheer tweets meme.

9. Toronto Sun reporter and vocal anti-Liberal Brian Lilley in two-year secret relationship with Doug Ford's Media Relations Lead, Ivana Yelich. Ford to issue exclusive press release to Toronto Sun explaining there's no conflict of interest.

10. Lilley deletes tweet from 2 years ago saying what he's doing now a conflict of interest only if another reporter is doing it like in the story he fabricated two years ago.
11. Ford's Comms team spend Friday night demonstrating proper Twitter road rage techniques.

12. With COVID cases surging again across Ontario Doug Ford moves Grey zones into colour code RGB 220, 220, 220.
13. In Friday's press conference Doug Ford insists new wing on Brampton hospital is an entirely new hospital because they're renaming the street New Hospital Road.

14. Newfoundland/Labrador vote in Liberal premier and announce all Newfie jokes now apply to Ontarians, Albertans, Manitobans and those folks from Saskatchewan with that Moe fella.
15. Scott Moe releases statement about Supreme Court ruling. Statement on green paper. That is all.

16. Doug Ford holds post-budget press conference Friday in Brampton and Patrick Brown demonstrates absolute fealty and pays homage to Doug's ill-fitting suits.
17. Former Conservative candidate selected to ask Doug why Wynne government was not perfect like Doug's government is.

18. Doug Ford says that other than the 500K doses of vaccine he's got tucked away right now in his office closet he hasn't seen a single vaccine from Trudeau.
19. Christine Elliot says Ontario's pandemic plan is in place with increased ICU beds. That's it. That's the funny part.

20. In response to news of conflict of interest and breech of journo code of ethics Brian Lilley tweets scrambled egg cooking video. Seriously.
21. Ford's Chief Issue Manager Cody Welton calls reporter a cave dweller who doesn't understand love. These guys make this way too easy.

22. Today Ontario's 7-day COVID test positivity average is above 2000 for 1st time since January, 16 people died, 366 are in ICU, and 64,950 vaccines were administered Saturday versus 82,996 delivered Friday. But, as Doug said on Friday, people need to get out and get haircuts.

23. Christine Elliot announces she'll get vaccinated before she's eligible in order to help fight vaccs hesitancy. Doug Ford stands up in Queen's Park and calls her "a queue jumper!" Oh, wait. That's not how that happened.
24. In other news, Conservatives call journalist racist.

25. Here's some good news. A year ago, there were no vaccines. And I don't mean like Doug says there's no vaccines. I mean there were no actual vaccines. And my Da's getting his second shot April 8th. And then I'm gonna hug him. And we don't do that. So yeah. We're getting there.

26. I'd like to close this week's list with a confession. No. I'm not dating Ivana. Here's the thing. I've been locked down since, well, it seems like forever. But, I have work. I have food. I have hair scissors and a decent hat collection.

I'm lucky.