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1) Ate--choked on--some humble pie today. Long story, but stumbled upon a recent comment from a former student (13 years ago) on Facebook, who remarked that she found it funny that so many regarded me so highly when she thought I was a bully who made fun of her. Bully. Me?
2)The notion that I had hurt a young lady hit me hard. It hit me harder that I had no idea. No idea. That's terrifying. As I thought back on our experience, what I thought was banter, she thought was bullying. It hit me hardest that she had been living with that all this time.
3)I responded and apologized most sincerely, sorry that I didn't know, sorry that I couldn't fix it. Went to school with a heavy heart, feeling the fraud as I wrote my MyRoomMessage and Sappy Sy Rhyme. I shared my weight with my students during Smiles and Frowns, and they were
4)surprised that I could do that. But I explained the banter/bully scenario and that I'd made a mistake, a terrible one. And I then, I asked them to please let me know if I'd ever made any of them feel so, and I'd set it right, telling them I didn't want them to feel that way,
5)ever--not now and certainly not 13 years from now. Fortunately, the former student replied to my apology, giving me the grace of her forgiveness. But she, sadly, will not forget, and neither will I. I have grown a lot as a human and teacher in the last 13 years. And today was
6)a humble reminder of the incredible power we hold over our kids' feelings. It's scary, particularly when we have no idea. So, I will seek to do better as I take this forward with me, wishing that better here had not come at the cost of shame. Dang, this is a tough job sometimes
