Thread by @vcstarterkit

10x Venture Capitalists

LPs, if you come across this rare breed of fund manager, immediately wire your commitment. Having a 10x VC in your portfolio significantly increases your odds of actually beating the S&P 500

OK, here is the $1B question:

How do you spot a 10x VC?

1. 10x VCs hate "operating". They think it is a waste of time and obvious. They'd rather focus on the more valuable thought leadership on Twitter. They only turn to "operator" mode when they realize there isn't a future for them at their firm and no other firm will hire them

2. Response times for 10x VCs are highly irregular. They tend to work when the ski resorts are closed and there's nothing better to do. Most of them are "not really office people" and "think best on the slopes". They don't reply to founders of investments they've written off.

3. 10x VCs only use an iPad and @Superhuman. They have mastered the art of keyboard shortcuts which is what lets them give such great business advice. The glass screen and keyboards have worn out j, k, and e keys (Superhuman email shortcuts)

4. 10x VCs know every deal happening in Silicon Valley. If they hear about a deal at the Battery that they weren't in, they know precisely which associate at every firm to hit up to get the founder's deck and deliver a term sheet to the founder within hours.

5. Many 10x VCs are full-stack money managers. For them all money is green and they don't care if it comes from a pension plan, Saudi Arabia, or even a children's hospital.

6. 10x VCs can convert shower thoughts into business plans in their mind and find founders. Given a market and sufficient La Croix, they can convince themselves that it's the greatest idea since sliced-bread and within a week find an internal EIR to work on it.

7. 10x VCs rarely read books (and especially not any fiction). They know everything about finance and history by heart. They can write investment memos based on a summary of Sapiens that they saw on Medium as quickly they can compose a thought leadership tweetstorm.

8. 10x VCs are always exploring new markets aheads of every other VC. They are not afraid of throwing hundreds of millions at juice companies or backing the next Theranos.

9. 10x VCs are poor collaborators because they don't want anyone else to become a VC. They always think "there's too much capital" and that having more managers "make its harder to raise from LPs all while driving up valuations"

10. 10x VCs don't participate in party rounds. They write meaningful checks and reserve the rest for pro-ratas. They don't throw good money after bad. They write at most two meaningful checks per year, and the rest is personal throw-away $25k checks

11. 10x VCs rarely leave venture. They move out because you make their life "miserable" with codes-of-conduct, programs to encourage diversity, but mostly when the @TheInformation publishes an expose of cases of their misconduct.

In case it wasn't clear - this is a parody of

https://twitter.com/skirani/status/1149302828420067328

please forgive the typos. I'm on my way to Aspen right now for a post-Fourth of July vacation

Forgot one more big one:

12. 10x VCs "support" diversity in venture but "don't want to lower the bar"