I remember, when my marriage was in a tough spot, learning from a lady who had been married 40 years that her marriage had been happy and almost never hard.
I was shocked. I had bought this narrative & surrounded myself with ppl who reinforced it...
I was shocked. I had bought this narrative & surrounded myself with ppl who reinforced it...
She and her husband were always seen holding hands, still, and sometimes she would put her head on his shoulder at the grandkids' sports & school.
It shook me awake. I had to figure out how to get that. I had to get my husband on my team in the search for that.
We started ..
It shook me awake. I had to figure out how to get that. I had to get my husband on my team in the search for that.
We started ..
counseling with a good therapist and committed to changing the ways we were both hanging onto behaviors that consistently hurt the other person.
THAT was hard. But once we stopped doing those things, the marriage itself became easy.
The work of caring enough about someone
THAT was hard. But once we stopped doing those things, the marriage itself became easy.
The work of caring enough about someone
to change the selfish, spiteful parts of yourself is, indeed, hard work.
But I think marriage is only truly hard when one or both of you won't do that work.
Because once you're both on that page, the marriage - and being together - is wonderful.
But I think marriage is only truly hard when one or both of you won't do that work.
Because once you're both on that page, the marriage - and being together - is wonderful.
