Thread by @MikeStuchbery_

I know I bang on about the ADD stuff, but there's an aspect of the experience of being diagnosed and treated that really sticks with me, and hurts.

I am now consumed with grief. /1

ADD has had a *major* effect on my since aged 19, when I started university. I muddled through before, but plunged into academia, I floundered.

Working night shifts, studying, I just couldn't cope and couldn't articulate why. /2

The next *20 years* saw me start well in jobs, but then flounder. I struggled with basic household tasks.

When I was in relationships, I'd never think of myself, and take on a carer role, as it was the only thing I felt any good at. /3

I was horribly taken advantage of, romantically, personally and professionally, by jobs and people.

Because of the depression and anxiety generated by the ADD, I also tended not to go out and enjoy myself. /4

When I was diagnosed and medicated, for the first time in my life I could function, look people in the eye, focus and do things like everyone else.

Now, I feel like I wasted decades, and have nothing to show for it. It's a torrent of emotions. /5

My personal relationships have changed as a result and it's frustrating that I just don't have the years of experience and emotional pallette to draw upon as others do.

In some ways, I get terribly lonely. /6

Not sure where I'm going with all of this, but I feel like I need to write it all down to get it out and look at it.

Any advice on how to process healthily gratefully accepted. /FIN