Thread by @snnitya

This month marks a decade since I completed medical #internship. I thought then that I had achieved my goal, that I would find joy in my work. Little did I know where life would lead me. My #reminisces & #reflections - too long for a tweet & too short for a blog - hence, a 🧵

As the first & only #medical student in the extended family, I was in #unfamiliar waters. Moving to uncle's house in another city was a not-too-comfortable but not-wholly-unpleasant change. I'm privileged to be part of a family who did all they could to keep me happy

The pedagogy was #authoritative & #oppressive; seemed to be designed to #humiliate, not teach. I couldn't learn by rote, didn't know of any better ways (pre- ubiquitous smartphone era) Expected to address #seniors using honorifics, I felt they were as unapproachable as teachers

I enjoyed #clinical postings initially, but soon realised that the theory was at odds with the practice. I remember a doctor-teacher couple - wife taught us about #MRSA & how to prevent #antimicrobialresistance; husband prescribed #Vancomycin for every post-operative patient

Days in the #OPD doubled as lessons in engaging with #pharmaceutical reps. Learnt the importance of #paperwork after being berated for leaving out #crucial information from a CT referral form - the referring doctor's name. #Overlords require documentary proof, you see

Hating both the theory and practice, each in different ways, it is no wonder I did not do well academically. I #failed in my first year & from then on, struggled to keep up. I enjoyed learning from #Harrison and his ilk; but exam preparation put to bed any developing interest

My sudden #fallfromgrace (pre-medical scores in the 90s to barely passing out of medical college) dealt a crushing blow to my self-esteem. It laid the foundation for my lack of confidence. What I loved about medical college was leaving it, never having to return.

I was taught all that a doctor needed to know to work in a hospital. I see now that it was limited. They didn't teach me #empathy, #medicalethics, #healthequity, #privacy, medical #research, options beyond/other than #clinicalmedicine - these are now the chosen foci of my career

"Not everyone can become Dr Devi Shetty. Some people end up in #CommunityMedicine" - A quote from, ironically, the #HeadofDepartment of Community Medicine. I intend no disrespect to the cardiac surgeon, but I am glad I ended up in #publichealth.

Given my #miserable experiences & lost #dreams, I was pleasantly surprised to discover others after me live life & puruse their passions while they practice medicine. @doctorandall, @stethospeaks & others on Twitter have rekindled my interest in #medicine & I'm grateful for it.