#TikolosheNews So for two weeks, residents of a small section of Cowdray Park suburb in Bulawayo, near Cowdray Park Primary, have been complaining that a mysterious creature is throwing stones at their houses, shattering windows and asbestos. They contributed $ to hire prophets 
Prophets arrived this afternoon to expectant crowds. They quickly identified a house where they alleged lived a tikoloshe. House owner, a Gumbo, seen here during the madness was asked if he owned such a creature. Said he used to, but called some prophets to remove it, surprised
So the prophets began their theatrical show. Crowds swelled. But as they prepared to storm the house and bring out the 'small boy', it somehow sprang free and attacked a child next door. Child taken to hospital unconscious. Bad start. 1-0 to the tikoloshe
By now, 3 hours is already gone. But no-one is leaving just yet. Then the major prophet declares he's going in. He issues a chilly warning: stand back because this thing won't go down without a fight. Cue nervous looks. He goes in, but small guy has barricaded self in the toilet
They don't call him prophet for nothing. Soon, he smokes the tikoloshe out of the toilet and guess what it does? It makes a last ditch dive into a closed clay pot. Last stand, if you like. Prophet sprinkles magic item on pot, and the pot starts shaking violently. Carries to door
Suddenly, house owner Gumbo who was cooperating all along grabs a hoe and tries to attack the prophet. He's apparently a local chairman of a political party and is worried about his reputation. Crowd, with 4 police officers present, disarms Gumbo and prophet puts down pot
But everyone is here for the tikoloshe? What now? Gumbo says wife at work, doesn't know this drama is unfolding. He doesn't like the crowds. Says wants a private ceremony, not this public spectacle. Stand-off ensues. In that moment, Gumbo makes dash for door and locks from inside
Now, prophet is outside and Gumbo is inside. Show is over surely? Nah, tikoloshe has one last surprise. Or as Columbo would say, "one more thing". From nowhere a stone strikes our prophet in the head, he hits the floor, bleeding. He gets up, but tikoloshe safe with Gumbo inside
Show is over. Tikoloshe has lived to die another day. Tonight, the residents of Cowdray Park will sleep with one eye open. The tikoloshe must be furious, and who's to say it won't pay those that cheered its near demise a visit? What happens next, I don't know. But be very afraid!
So tonight, tikoloshe is targeting criminals around Gumbo who wanted to kill him. Beware the stone-throwing Chuck Norris 🤣
Zimbabweans be like "vela sikubone tikoloshe". Ayikho leyo. Utikoloshe uyasetshenzelwa guys. So our prophet must return with vengeance tomorrow, maybe then will tikoloshe bless us with a selfie
