It is never a bad time to consider how you can help someone who may be at risk for suicide. But with 2 high profile suicides in just a week, it may be especially relevant now to review 4 QUESTIONS TO ASK.
So here is Suicide Assessment 101, the Twitter version. Commit these questions to memory. Don’t be afraid of engaging. You might save a life.
1) Have you had any thoughts of suicide? (What kind? How often?) Answers range from vague/infrequent “I sometimes wish I wouldn’t wake up” to specific/frequent “I battle the idea of killing myself every day.” And pay attention to nonverbals.
Your reaction here is especially important. React with shock and disbelief, and you may heap more guilt and shame on a person. Try to react calmly, patiently, and with every ounce of empathy you can muster.
Note: It is a mistake to believe that you might actually *cause* suicidal thoughts by asking about them. You are not going to “plant” suicidal thoughts by compassionately asking about them. The rule is: If you are in doubt, ask.
2) Do you have a plan? You might phrase it like this, “If you were going to hurt yourself, do you know how you would do it?” Answers range from “No, I don’t really know yet” to “Yes, I know exactly how I would do it.” Get the details.
3) Do you have a way of carrying out your plan? (Do they have the means or materials for the plan?) For example, if a person says the plan is to shoot themselves, do they have access to a gun? If the plan is to overdose on pills, do they have access to those pills?
I may start another thread on intervention strategies based on the information you get from these 4 questions. But here is once place to immediately intervene: Remove the way to carry out their plan. Take the gun. Take the pills. If they get angry at you, so be it.
4) What is motivating you? There’s a lot in this question and you can ask it several ways, but you want to know how likely it is they might carry out their plan. What keeps them from doing it? What is their level of intent?
Some people will say they think about suicide, they have a specific plan, they could easily carry out their plan, and they might still say, “but you know, I don’t think I would really ever do it. It would hurt my family too much.”
They are using suicidal thoughts/daydreams as a coping mechanism. It is a *terrible* coping mechanism, but this is probably better than the person who says, “I don’t know what keeps me from doing it. There's nothing to live for. And everyone would be better off without me.”
Four questions.
Thoughts.
Plan.
Way.
Intent.
If in doubt, ask. Then act accordingly. There is no perfect assessment (or intervention). But never underestimate the impact of your genuine investment in a person.
Suicide Assessment 101, the Twitter version.
Thoughts.
Plan.
Way.
Intent.
If in doubt, ask. Then act accordingly. There is no perfect assessment (or intervention). But never underestimate the impact of your genuine investment in a person.
Suicide Assessment 101, the Twitter version.
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