1/ In 2015, my gf & I openly spoke about our new gender critical beliefs on tumblr despite having a tumblr based business that was making the majority of our income. Why? Because we talked about it & it was the right thing to do. We took an immense hit to our finances, it sucked.
2/ People we’d been friends with for years said we deserved to “starve in the streets”. I was mocked for being open about my fear of having to return to the sex industry. The interpersonal fallout was intense, we struggled with money, it was painful. I would never take it back.
3/ For every 100 people telling me to get raped or kill myself, there was 1 who heard what we had to say. Feminism has always, always been in a cycle of forward movement & intense backlash. I suggest reading Backlash by Faludi (US focus) & Women of Ideas by Spender for more info
4/ This is nothing new, women willing to put themselves & their livelihood on the line is not new. Women willing to literally put their lives on the line as women do globally is not new. What is new is the cultivation of fragility intensified by social media. We need bravery.
5/ Years of online harassment didn’t kill me. Yes, it was detrimental to my emotional well-being (& still can be). Yes, it does affect our ability to market & sell our work. But truth is essential to my day to day life. It’s essential to forming meaningful, deep relationships.
6/ Just like when Magdalen passed, I urge any women who aren’t open about their beliefs to take serious stock of how doing so would affect your life. Pros/cons. Then, own that. Do not say you “can’t” be openly feminist, denying your own agency. Name why you choose not to - won’t.
7/ What would make it worth it to be openly feminist? Or opening up about your beliefs to someone you truly care about? Do not catastrophize. Do not say you “can’t.” Face yourself & what your values mean in your day to day life honestly. To me, nothing is more worth it.
