Like many people, I can’t stop thinking about this story. I can’t recall how many times a bank has treated me like a criminal. The friction of just daily living while black is overwhelming
I believe that burn-out and anxiety are real traumas for all kinds of people trying live in a complex society. But when black people say we are overwhelmed at the thought of a phone call or a routine consumer interaction? We are talking about a distinct degree of exhaustion.
Can’t get the gas station cashier to turn on the pump. Can’t get the barista to give you five minutes before you buy coffee. Can’t get on the train without a visible stub in your hand. Can’t deposit a check without an independent third party verification.
What white people get done on their lunch hour can take us three days to accomplish. That’s anxiety.
This is why I think we are early adopters. We will try anything to minimize that friction. Even when know the technology will eventually be turned on us, we negotiate short term gains because how can we not?
Errands might take thirty minutes, might take three hours. The variability - always as the whim of someone given power over your day - makes it worse. You can’t predict how this basic activity is going to go. And all human beings are set up for prediction.
Prediction is how we manage complexity. But when I can’t predict the cost of any given interaction because racism may distort it, I am pre-tired.
I am already tired from next week. And none of the general burnout strategies can mitigate that.
