Thread by @RFentonMD

Rotating on the peds trauma service, I met a Black young man who was shot in the abdomen. The word was it was “gang activity”. No one bothered to ask more questions.

I walked in the room and saw a boy who was scared. He feared the outcomes of surgery and getting shot again.

1/

He looked anxiously at his mother whenever she came to his bedside. With tough love in her eyes, she explained that she asked him to move out and live with an older brother due to conflicts at home. Her expression seemed to question if she made the right decision

2/

Alone, I asked him what happened that night. He said he was hanging with girl friends who decided to buy weed. He went out with them to meet the dealer. The dealer tried to rob them, and when he resisted, he got shot. I just listened. His face already filled with enough shame

3/

“Did you see your x-ray?”, I asked. He shook his head. I pulled up the pic of a bullet wedged in his spine. He looked at it, in silence, & cried. I explained, “Your nerves are intact and that colostomy will come out in months. It will be a hard road, but this is not the end.”

4/

Outside, I recounted my heart-to-heart to my White male attending. “I just don’t trust him,” he said. Sensing my disappointment, he laughed “maybe I’ve just been here too long.” I was internally furious at this reminder that Black people are always expected to prove ourselves

5/

This teen, in a position of vulnerability, had to prove that he’s a “good kid.” I lacked the words to fight this battle with my attending. My interaction with him brutally reminded me how much society doesn’t trust or value Black boys. It broke me then and still does now.

6/

My job as a doctor doesnt give me the right to evaluate someone’s character or decisions; it requires that I support their thriving. As I remember my dear patient, I’m reminded to combat the systems that threaten our patients’ health over judging their individual actions.

END