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I realised due to lack of awareness on my neurodiversity, I seem to have my year divided into social quaters.
For 2 months I am all masking and trying to get comfortable. And reach a point where I get way too comfortable and mess up and hush back to month long flashback and guilt
For 2 months I am all masking and trying to get comfortable. And reach a point where I get way too comfortable and mess up and hush back to month long flashback and guilt
And this phase makes me question who I really am. What my true nature is.
I feel extremely guilty of how much I have hurt myself. How vulnerable I am. How I don't have any Identity to depend on.
I feel extremely guilty of how much I have hurt myself. How vulnerable I am. How I don't have any Identity to depend on.
Have to digest the truth that my disability was affecting me way more than I could comprehend.
𧔠The fact that psychiatrists will go on blindly prescribing SSRIs, beta blockers and even benzodiazepenes to their patients for prolonged periods of times without even informing them of the long term risks and that meds aren't gonna magically solve all their issues is just..
...seriously appalling. They tell people how depression/anxiety/ADHD/literally any mental disorder is just a chemical imbalance in your brain and how this certain medication will treat you by bringing your brain to the right balance again...
... like our brains are some sort of a weighing scale with perfectly balanced neurotransmitters? Who's gonna tell patients that dealing with any mental disorder needs cognitive behavioral modifications that require therapy and not just simply shoving pills down their throats?
We need to stop using derogatory terms such as âtreatment-resistantâ or ânon-compliant.â There are many reasons involved, many of which are either the therapy framework or the therapists themselves. It is utter arrogance and delusion to exclusively place the onus (1)
on the patient with no room for self-reflection. âIf the therapy doesnât work, itâs the patientâs fault, not the therapy itselfâ is a mentality that needs to go. It hinders progress by shutting doors to the formulation of newer & innovative frameworks. We hear everywhere how (2)
CBT is âevidence-basedâ: but for whom? Does it account for neurodivergentsâ sensory processing differences affecting every level of psychological, social, and mental functioning? No. There are many neurodivergent people struggling with their mental health and they arenât (3)
Recent events involving my family, again, voluntelling me to intervene with a cousin who is struggling with depression and other unresolved issues. For the first time, it made me really angry and I wasn't sure why at first. I have been digging into that for a while now [1]
I started thinking about it today in light of a paper I'm writing for class. I unearthed some memories that had long since been forgotten or suppressed (I never know these days). But I realized I have a lot of resentment over how my mental health was treated vs. my siblings. [2]
Technically, being the "oldest" in my family, I was the experiment kid and none of my three parents were really equipped to deal with my disposition. I can remember being depressed, not sleeping, and sitting in front of a computer for hours on end. [3]
