1. It keeps being asked: Why would anyone wait decades to publicly disclose sexual assault?
I know why. I can write this cause I wrestled with disclosure in years of writing my book A Mind Unraveled. Rather than wait til October book release, as Dr. Ford is slammed, I tell now..
I know why. I can write this cause I wrestled with disclosure in years of writing my book A Mind Unraveled. Rather than wait til October book release, as Dr. Ford is slammed, I tell now..
2….I was raped in my twenties while incapacitated after an epileptic seizure. The injuries required me to seek medical attention at a hospital. The period in the emergency room was an emotional blur, of shutting down, of focusing on anything other than the attack…
3…in the fantasy version invoked by no one ever attacked, I should have reported the crime to law enforcement. I could not imagine doing so. This was before DNA, I could not identify the perpetrator because of my state when the attack occurred, and I couldn't handle it…
4…I wanted nothing more than to get out of the hospital, to make the whole experience go away. And I did an excellent job of burying the emotions for years. Even while seeing a psychologist, it took me forever to disclose. I just didn’t want to feel the emotional pain…
5...I didnt want to think about it at all. Because thinking meant feeling, and feeling terrified me. I told my wife around 2004 – after 24 years of marriage and about 30 years after the attack. She could not have been more supportive. She urged me to get....
6...counseling to help me work through the emotions I had buried for so long. Again, it took me a long time to tell the counselor. When I was writing my book about my experiences living with intractable epilepsy, I wrestled with disclosing this publicly. I decided I couldn’t…
7…my wife convinced me, if I was going to write about myself, I had to tell the truth. The whole truth. She told me I had nothing to hide, no reason for shame. I cried, repeatedly, just thinking about writing about it, almost 35 years after it happened…
8…I hoped to use my adult children as an excuse not to disclose. I told them what had happened, and asked if they would be embarrassed if I revealed it in my book. They all offered me endless support, and urged me to do so….
9. …Perhaps the most stunning thing to me was that both my wife and my oldest son told me they knew long before I told. There was nothing I said that gave it away, but they both could tell I was keeping something terrible hidden…
10…Even now, knowing that this assault will be disclosed in a few weeks in my book, I struggle with writing these tweets. Does it make sense to those who have never been through this? For many, no. Does it make sense to those who have? Almost certainly yes…
11…this is not a political statement. I do not know what happened with Judge Kavenaugh. But I do know that Dr. Ford deserves her allegations to be investigated, that a sexual assaulter – no matter how long he committed the act – should never serve on the Supreme Court...
12...and that such a possibility is of such enormous consequence that it must be investigated. Attacking Dr. Ford - without investigating her allegations - for not publicly disclosing demonstrates a decided lack of empathy, a lack of understanding...
13... a selection of politics over humanity. If I knew who my assaulter was, if I knew I would be ripped to shreds by powerful people for politics, I would never disclose. knowing – KNOWING – that the politicians ready to pounce had no interest in finding out the truth, only...
14...wanted to set up an attack, only wanted to violate me all over again, meant I would never speak. Just as they hope Dr. Ford won’t. If these allegations are treated as ho-hum, as a crime that happened decades ago, as unworthy of investigation, then the message...
15...being communicated is that all sexual assault victims must immediate shove aside the emotional trauma, run to the police, or shut up forever. That is how child molestation occurs. That is how rapists get away with their crimes. That is how allegations of criminal activity...
16...go uninvestigated for political purposes. We are being told, even if we manage to navigate the agony to disclose, we will be attacked. The fraud being perpetrated by insisting that this must only be a he-said-she-said, that no other witnesses will be called, that nothing…
17...is more important than rushing through confirmation, that this might not be investigated communicates a terrible message: our pain is inconsequential, our perpetrators had the right to violate us, and politicians consider victory more important than allegations of assault.
